[ladyrevan21]

Basically, I was just thinking about something -- the more layer-work I'm doing, so to speak, the more I've got some old anger from three years ago that won't go away. The question is how to let go of it? I've tried to let go of it, but I can't say I've been successful.

Any ways I can let go of that anger so I can start enjoying life more?

[Thunder Bow]

Some times our mind will hang on to old angers to keep feeling bad about one self. It is an easy process to get into. Because old anger has become an old friend. It can be scary to let go of.

[Serzen]

Meditate every day. Start with few minutes.

[*Laurie*]

I'd like to know, too. I have old grudges against my husband that I cannot seem to let go of. The only thing I can think of is recognizing that holding onto old anger/resentment harms us a whole lot more than it harms anyone else, and that's the truth.

[Shaly78]

It probably depends on what the old grudges is, but lately I have been having like these ceremonies writing what hurt, what can I do to not let it happen again, what was actually okay, let's say if it was a relationship...I decided to just let it all go forgive and not let it anger me again.....Some things are to teach you how to avoid those disappointments again, so I cut it off right before I know it will end up that way so I don't have to worry about grudges.....

[ladyrevan21]

Thunder Bow: I think you nailed it. I think in a way I am holding onto it because in a way, I don't really want to confront my true feelings. Basically, my worry that I'm a bad person. (I think I've always had that worry to some degree) It didn't help that I said a lot of stuff I shouldn't have. (Trust me, you would not have liked me in that moment if you read what I wrote. I don't think even being a teenager in college really excuses it -- I was technically an adult. I could have kept my head)

Serzen: That's a wonderful idea. It helps that I already have the apps on my phone, so maybe every day (whether I'm angry or not) I can just pull it up and calm myself down.

LauraBeth: I'm really sorry about your husband. And that's true. It's definitely kind of poisoned me a bit, to the point of not really trusting happiness much. I think it even kind of kept me a bit hermitlike just because I was dwelling in it. I think I even relied on it in a way. So...yeah, I think I've held onto it too long. Maybe I'm kind of scared of what will happen if I let go of it.

Shaly78: She was an old friend of mine. I think what really hurt was that in the beginning, I kind of saw her as like a mentor to me, and the older sister I never had. (I'm the older kid in my family, and when I was a kid, I always kind of wished I had an older sister to look to. I was fortunate to have many awesome role models over the years, though, so there is that. I guess I just kind of wished for an older sister) And then I just started noticing how nasty she could be to other people. She kind of broke things off with me, but we were still in the same fandom and I ended up kind of watching her just be...awful to people. I think she was angry and wanted to make sure others felt it, and she never considered the humanity of other people. She even kind of made a "joke"/threat about shooting up the place where the main person she was angry at lived. I guess that's what gets me.

But I like your idea a lot. Doing a bit of a writing ceremony. That and cutting off an unhealthy relationship before it gets too bad.

Honestly, everyone in this thread has given me wonderful ideas. Thank you.