how to overcome yourself?

I am wondering how can I be better than I am, more calm, more joyful, how can I overcome my bad habits in emotions. What should my mindset be so I can learn to love and learn how to let myself be loved.

Hello LadyBug098: Years ago, the Skeezyks attended a partial hospital program where they said: "Don't should on yourself!" I'm an older person now. And as I have aged I have come to realize I can only be the person I've always been. So I simply strive to accept myself (and all my many, many faults)... with lovingkindness & compassion. It is struggle enough for one lifetime...

Look into DBT (Dialectical Behavior Therapy) either in a program or you can purchase workbooks. I have been doing workbooks and it is helpful. DBT is very good for understanding our emotions, and overcoming emotions we do not find useful if they become too intense. Good Luck.

All the above is good advice. Also never look for reasons to feel bad about yourself. Never compare yourself to others. That is a short cut to feeling bad about yourself.

What is it that you want to be better at?
I think if you start with a few minor things you can have a starting point. Otherwise, you'll overwhelm yourself and we don't want that!

Personally, I always think there's room for improvement. That's what keeps life interesting, you know? It's what helps to keep us from that "blah" phase.

A LOT of people will tell you not to compare yourself with others and for some I think this is sound advice. It depends on your personality. Personally, I strive when I compare myself with others. It's how I know if I'm being realistic or not. I have the "if she can do it, I can do it" or the "if she can get that, I can get that" mentality, . I'm afraid if I never compared myself to anyone else I'd have very low standards.

Just try to figure out which approach works for you and be open to TRY, . As long as you're trying things will fall into place.

Never compare yourself to others! You are the greatest person you could ever be! We all wish to be prettier, wealthier, more popular, whatever, but each of us has a hidden pain.

Just love yourself for who you are and try to learn something new everyday! Or even better write down what you feel, you never know it could be a book someday!

I wish I could be better than who I am, I do, I still do. But there is just me. Just wonderful me. And wonderful you!

Quote: "In order to love one's self,one must behave in
ways one can admire."

Accentuate the positive no one goes around hating 100% in all they do. Why don't you pick out what went right and what you can really look at yourself and say this was my fault start to change that and require that in another mate, or at least a mate that is good with conflict resolution cause that is inevitable and in some cases healthy.

Accept yourself.

It is not the OP's wish to simply accept herself, as she states that there are things about herself she would like to modify or change. DBT (Dialectical Behavior Therapy) emphasizes accepting two seemingly paradoxical concepts: 1) Radically accept the way one is at this moment, and 2) Radically accept that in order to meet new goals one may need to change one's emotions, thoughts, and behaviors. OP, you can do it! Please look into DBT.

As I have learned, it is easy to suffer alone in your head of the pain of low self-worth. Negativity is as accepted as the sun having heat, but learning patterns of how to control the painful notions about yourself makes you happier. It isn't easy to accept and trust yourself because you have told yourself all the wrong things. Relaxing and observing yourself and take in positivity and replacing the negative energy works to refocus your energies from destructive to productive! I'm still figuring this out too, yet it's doable!