Wish I could know if people really like me

I always go through periods where I wish I could find a way to see if people really actually like me or care about me. I am always alone, always left out of social events and just not wanted by others. Sometimes I can tolerate it because I'm used to is but other times I get really annoyed and feel down. I never actually thought of suicide, and I don't plan on it either.

Sometimes though, I wish I could, in a way, fake my own death or something similar for awhile. Like, just simply leave or not talk to anyone for like a week or two just to see how many care and who they are, as well as how many doesn't care and who they are too. I know it sounds childish and I really couldn't pull it off, but sometimes I wish I could. Also sometimes wish I could find a way to see if people like me and why most people don't. Anyone else have this desire? Any suggestions on how to go about this and know how to determine if I am liked and if I am not, then why.

How do you feel about other people? Youre gonna get out of it, what you put into it. Do you feel like you have put yourself out there, communicated with people, listened to what they wanted to say, helped them out? If so, then i think you would have connected with people, and you would have your answer. It starts with, how well did you connect with the people who raised you - it kinda sets the pattern for how you relate to people ever after.

Have you ever thought about going on a religious or nature retreat? That might help. It did me, when I was younger.