That Moment When...

You realize your emotions are basically burdens to those around you. Didn't even want to make this thread but no one I know IRL wants to deal with how I feel. Too much to ask for, I guess. I suppose I'm not really worth the effort or time. My apologies. Seems like all I do is get in the way.

How DO you feel?

You ARE worth it. I'm sorry there is no one IRL that can listen. We'll understand here

Very much alone and like I am not understood by people around me and never will be no matter how much I explain. I feel like I am perceived as whiny and weak when I do speak on how I feel and like I am perceived as too quiet and closed off when I do not. I feel like I can't win. I feel like I am a loser. I feel like everyone should probably just give up on me and perhaps a part of me wants them to so that their lives may be easier. I don't want to go through everything alone with no care or support around me either, though. I feel like the way I feel is not the way I should feel because I have been made to feel wrong for feeling the way I have felt for so long.

Sorry if this response sounds confused/annoying, but perhaps this is a major reason why no one really wants to hear about my true feelings...because of how confused and annoying I always sound? I think it's safe to say it makes life easier for others if I say nothing or just lie. Then no one has to deal with the burden of trying to care.

Really appreciate you asking, though. Thank you.

I feel much like you do, alot of the time...

I have discovered that if I put a few eggs in a few different baskets, then my needs or at least some of them are met, at least some of the time.

What I mean by that is, I will speak about loneliness or depression with my bf, and he gets it and is willing to listen and be compassionate... Then I speak anxiety and loser to my bff and she gets it and is willing to listen, I speak stress and responsibility to my cousin, and Bipolar stuff to my closest online friend etc...

This way I'm not whining all the time, and nobody's basket is overflowing with my shyt...

This mostly works, except I'm not very good at reaching out, and for some reason that neither therapy nor inflection has figured out, I still feel and believe that nobody truly understands and I feel really alone on this planet.

I'm really sorry to hear that you've been dealing with these painful challenges, and hope you can find a way to improve and feel better. From my own journey toward self discovery, I believe that lack of self worth is a good place to start.

Sorry you deal with similar feelings Trippin2.0, but I'm glad to hear there are people in your life you can go to about different things and get support. What you say makes a lot of sense. I'll definitely take it into consideration.

Thanks so much Mickey. That is very comforting to hear. Nice of you to say.

Thank you both for your kind and thoughtful replies. Means the world.

I'm sending hugs

(((((LotusBlossom)))))

I sure can relate.

Thanks so much Mickey. That is very comforting to hear. Nice of you to say.
This way I'm not whining all the time, and nobody's basket is overflowing with my shyt...