How do I freaking stop being jealous?

I don't want that feeling. Sometimes I think I'm ready to undergo a brain surgery to remove the part responsible for it.

I had a crush on my housemate next door in a rooming house. We were friends. Then he started bringing people to have sex with and I'd go crazy. Like can't sleep or eat, the adrenaline levels spiking up so high yet on the outside, of course I wouldn't show it, act totally cool. It's probably to do with my childhood traumas, domestic violence and other stuff.

It may be jealousy or it may not because I know he goes out to have sex and I have no reaction, completely calm as long as it's outside the house but as soon as I hear steps or them having sex next room I go nuts.

I stopped being friends with him and talking to him at all hoping this would get rid of the feeling. The feeling indeed is of a lesser extent but still really bothersome and disruptive.

I can't move out, I have no money. The day I can move out or he moves out would be the best day of the year. How do I deal with it until then? It's like living in a state of constant fear. I'm so angry with myself. Please help. I've also been suffering from depression which doesn't really help in this situation.

Hello skyfleet: I don't know as there is much of anything in particular I can offer in the way of suggestions regarding your concern. But I noticed this is your first post here on PC. So... welcome to PsychCentral.

Here are links to 7 articles, from Psych Central's archives, that may offer some suggestions:

8 Healthy Ways to Deal with Jealousy

8 Ways To Overcome Jealousy and Envy

Suffering From Jealousy? Try These 10 Tips to Overcome It

9 Ways to Let Go of Stuck Thoughts

Why Can't I Shut Off My Mind?

https://blogs.psychcentral.com/relat...-event-1-of-2/

https://blogs.psychcentral.com/relat...dium=popular17

I hope you find PC to be of benefit.

Thank you, I'll read them. I also see a therapist but we can't solve the problem, it's been going on for months.

((((skyfleet)))) I'm sorry you're struggling. I think you need to work with your therapist about this, since it bothers you that much. If it still doesn't work, perhaps you should cosnider changing therapist? I'm so sorry

Maybe you feel like his sex life is more real when it's in the house? When he's out the house you're not 100% sure what he's doing and therefore can't feel jealous.

I also feel discomfort when I'm next door to people who are having sex because I'm not a voyeur. Is there some way you can go spend the evening with a friend or an acquaintance when he is doing this? Or maybe ask if he can go with his date to their home?