How are you coping today? #5

I’m doing okay, I’ve been given an unexpected day off tomorrow and I saw family who I haven’t seen in some months this afternoon, which was nice. I like this peaceful zone in between Christmas and New Year. I made a nice meal with left overs this evening and everyone seemed to enjoy it - still no taste from covid but I liked the texture!

I don't know. I apologized to my mom but I haven't heard back. I don't think I'm coping well. I'm afraid she'll ignore me.

The door delivery service kept pushing the time back, so then I called and rescheduled for tomorrow night. That gives me time tonight to finish laundry and do other things in the apartment. I cleaned most of my living room walls. They are looking brighter and whiter now. Yay! I really want to dump my trash and put my stuff into storage, but I'm afraid of running into any neighbors. I'll need to wait for early morning tomorrow in order to do all that. I did a lot of cleaning today though, so I feel good about that.

I am doing well!! I went out on a date and decided that I'm happier being alone. I love my freedom. I don't need anybody telling me what I do. So, I am really happy. I am healthy and free. I love it here also. I found a cheap dim sum place- ate all kinds of dumplings- and tapioca/ bean dessert- yummy! Life is great!! Of course, I wish my family was with me. Despite being alone, I am so busy that I don't feel lonely. I have more chores to do this week. So, I will be busy until the next year starts. Cheers! Happy New Year!!

I finally got the groceries I needed. Someone told me that sourkraut is good luck for the new year, so I got that with some vegan hot dogs and 12-grain bread (for fiber, nutrients, etc.). I also got my Diet Coke! I'm addicted to Diet Coke. It's so hard to just drink water. I do drink water now, but I need the fizz in Diet Coke, LOL.

I got pizza, some Lean Cuisine, some other frozen meals on sale, vanilla ice cream, cherries for the ice cream, frozen pizza, kimchi, laundry detergent, and cheddar cheese.

The lady was really nice and personable. She said she had a dream about expiration dates, and I always put expiration date notes in the notes (like please make sure the bread expires in January 2022, or please make sure the cheese expires in March of 2022 or later). She followed my directions precisely. She also wore a mask, when I looked out my door's peephole. She said she was shopping for herself at the same time, and her kids loved the cherries, too. She felt like getting some ice cream and decided to pick up my order. I thought that was cool. I really wanted to get that out of the way tonight. I also got to put the 40 boxes in my storage, the 12 bins in storage, and many other things in storage, too. My apartment is getting really organized, and my living room is half-empty now. I'm so happy! I wanted to ring in the new year with an organized apartment, and I'm almost there! My poor storage cages are a mess though, but I can get to those next month. At least my apartment is halfway deep cleaned. I'm super tired now though.

I disinfected all the groceries - one by one - with Clorox wipes. I put most of them away.

I showered after I was done.

I wore my N99 mask with a KN95 mask on top. It was a little hard to breathe, but I did it all! I walked in the snow outside to dump trash, too.

I feel like I really accomplished a lot this week, even though I was highly triggered a couple of days this week.

I am so frustrated.

a dvd I like (malcom in the middle season 1) has gone missing from my season 1-7 box set

even though it can't have gone far, it litirally isn't anywhere

and it's winding me up because you can't have a series collection without one of the series

My mom accepted my apology. So I am glad. I feel overwhelmed this morning. I'm coping with my journal and iced coffee.

@raging vortex - I hope you find your missing DVD. Is it the DVD only or the case with the DVD inside it? If it's the DVD only, could it be inside one of your machines or put into an album or book accidentally? If the case nd the DVD are both missing, could it have fallen in between cushions or the bed or like a book shelf or magazine rack? I'm not sure what you have in your home, but it could be in any of those places. If you dissociate sometimes, it could be in the fridge. I once placed my keys in the fridge and freaked out until I went to make myself something to eat. I laughed after I found it. That was years ago though. I don't make that mistake much anymore.

If you had any friends borrow it, or if you have a pet dog or cat, could one of them have accidentally taken it and misplaced it?

I don't know why I have always loved helping people I live with find missing things. It was like a 50/50 chance of them actually finding it, but it was fun for me to help. I'm weird that way.

Deilla, I'm glad your mom accepted your apology. I hope you two are able to work out a stronger relationship.

I'm sorry you feel overwhelmed today. Your coping skills sound really soothing and helpful. I miss iced coffees. I love warm coffees, too, so I make those. I keep forgetting to get an ice cube tray so that I can use distilled water to make ice cubes for things like that. I don't trust the tap water that comes into the freezer to make ice cubes. I'm weird.

I did ok today. I didnt go overboard on the caffeine for once. I'm nauseated though. I wonder if that flamin hot Mountain Dew I had the other day messed with my gastro system more then I realized. This has been happening a lot since I drank that. I haven't finished my normal daily pitcher of iced tea today. Mental health wise I feel ok.

Ok, and don’t want to feel things at all. But feelings are below the surface maybe, stress with a sore jaw. Sadness with just a flat feeling instead to numb it all out. Why feel, why not just get into get things done mode, block it out, it’s not there. Maybe it’s at the back burner, waiting, to surface again when least expected, or when it’s ok.

I've been there with the feelings just under the surface. You're not really "numb," but you're not really "emotional" either. It's a strange place of "limbo" to be in.

I hope you feel better. If you have a T, then maybe speaking about these issues with the T could help you.

I have difficulty with expressing emotions, even though I feel them on the inside. I much prefer to process emotional expression with my T than by myself or anyone else. I heard that it is healthy when you have safe, validating, and trustworthy friends in person to witness your emotions and comfort you, but it's hard when you really don't trust anyone and have a history of child abuse or neglect in the past.

Quote:

Originally Posted by SprinkL3 I finally got the groceries I needed. Someone told me that sourkraut is good luck for the new year, so I got that with some vegan hot dogs and 12-grain bread (for fiber, nutrients, etc.). I also got my Diet Coke! I'm addicted to Diet Coke. It's so hard to just drink water. I do drink water now, but I need the fizz in Diet Coke, LOL. I got pizza, some Lean Cuisine, some other frozen meals on sale, vanilla ice cream, cherries for the ice cream, frozen pizza, kimchi, laundry detergent, and cheddar cheese. The lady was really nice and personable. She said she had a dream about expiration dates, and I always put expiration date notes in the notes (like please make sure the bread expires in January 2022, or please make sure the cheese expires in March of 2022 or later). She followed my directions precisely. She also wore a mask, when I looked out my door's peephole. She said she was shopping for herself at the same time, and her kids loved the cherries, too. She felt like getting some ice cream and decided to pick up my order. I thought that was cool. I really wanted to get that out of the way tonight. I also got to put the 40 boxes in my storage, the 12 bins in storage, and many other things in storage, too. My apartment is getting really organized, and my living room is half-empty now. I'm so happy! I wanted to ring in the new year with an organized apartment, and I'm almost there! My poor storage cages are a mess though, but I can get to those next month. At least my apartment is halfway deep cleaned. I'm super tired now though. I disinfected all the groceries - one by one - with Clorox wipes. I put most of them away. I showered after I was done. I wore my N99 mask with a KN95 mask on top. It was a little hard to breathe, but I did it all! I walked in the snow outside to dump trash, too. I feel like I really accomplished a lot this week, even though I was highly triggered a couple of days this week.

I hate plain water I dont know what is wrong with me. I have settled on seltzer and got a good deal on soda stream.

Me too! I will only drink Nestle brand or even the Kroeger brand (I think the generic brand from Fred Meyer, if that is the name of the supermarket in your area). Sometimes I'll drink distilled.

I usually put Crystal Light in my water though. They have some interesting flavors, and some with caffeine, like grape.

Lately, playing games here when I can helps me cope. Also I like to read things that distract me &/or uplift me. Sometimes these will work. During these gloomy months, seeing sunshine really helps.

thanks @SprinkL3,
those are all really good suggestions, and I will be sure to update you if I find it

I have been dressed and wide awake since 1:15 A.M this morning

you know that phrase imsomnia sucks, well..... it does.

I just finished watching a quiz show- but that is all I really had planned for today

bit sad really, it's not even the afternoon yet

I got 4 hours of sleep. I woke up at 1:30 and I drank 3 zero sugar watermelon Mountain Dews and at first I was ok. Then around 5 I had some stomach issues and I just felt off. I had a virtual therapy session. I think it was her today but It wasnt directed at me. She was just in a general mood. But I had enough of my med situation which was causing all these issues so I called my pdocs office and got the med I was out of for several days figured out. The pharamcy had it ready super fast and I already took one and I got Chipotles for lunch. I still feel pretty tired but my moods are much calmer now.

I am just coping, but I still have hope & my imagination.

I played a game online with other veterans and our recreational rehab therapist from the VA. I lost, but it was fun interacting with the same veterans.

It finally stopped raining and the sunshine and warmth made me feel good.

I'm coping with Klonopin and journaling.

today I emailed a friend about the abuse I suffered growing up

she had asked me why I find it so hard to make friends, and it came up as I was replying

I just hope she understands and can look further than the abuse

One task at a time, one moment at a time, because a day or even an hour is too long at a time.

I've needed some form of oral fixation for almost 5 days. I've used it for 3 nights. I'm guessing its just how I'm responding to stress. Probably covid and post holiday blues stuff. I haven't needed anything in awhile and 3 nights in a row is really unusual. So tonight is night number 4 and I really didnt want to use the other one again but I havent been able to find my gatorade water bottle my non accepting no autism knowledge last T suggested. Although it was a pretty good suggestion and it does help a ton. I was trying not to make a big deal out of not being able to find it but finally tonight I just had my mom help me look for it and she found it and didnt ask any questions. My stomach is still queasy for some reason so I dont feel like drinking a bunch of water or eating dinner. But overall I coped well today.