I Think I'm Depressed Again

I feel hopeless and lost... I feel like I have no sense of who I am or what I want to do with my life anymore. I feel paralyzed when it comes to making decisions, because I am 100% positive I'm going to make the wrong one. I hate my new job and don't plan to stay there for much longer. The thing is, I don't want to be a pharmacy technician anymore, if I'm going to be completely honest. But what else would I be? I feel rudderless and I don't like it. I'm having a phone discussion with a career coach in January, and I have two interviews set up for part-time work next week. I just don't want to do anything. I have no motivation. I just want to curl up under the covers and snuggle my kitty. I feel like I have a lot of options out there... but I don't know what they are.

I am so sorry that you are going through this ordeal. It is so difficult to feel good when one doesn't know what direction to take.

Although I am not in your shoes and wouldn't want to trespass on the uniqueness of your life and experience, I have been in a similar situation to the one you describe.

A good friend of mine was a Pharm Tech. He was in the last year of his Pharm D program and worked in a retail chain. One night when he was leavingwork, he took a package of little donuts. What he did was caught on a security camera and he was fired. Luckily his employer did not seek to prosecute him. His pharmacy career was pretty much over after that. Luckily he got a job in state government and is doing very well now.

I imagine that being a Pharm Tech is very stressful. I am thankful that there are such people in the world but I don't think I could handle a job like that. I hope you find something that you find worthwhile and fulfilling. Sorry I don't know how to be helpful to you. Hopefully others here will have better words for you than my poor words!

Thank you Yaowen, you are always so thoughtful and empathetic, and I really appreciate it

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It’s not what you do but what your state of mind.
You are depressed and it’s normal you feel a big void and feel hopeless. Could you take a time, I mean...enjoy a time to recover from the depression so you will have your future clearer.
It’s obvious that your depression is telling you something. A change maybe, that you are not still ready to do. See depression as an alley that is calling your attention for changes.

I once heard that discomfort is the catalyst for change, or something of that sort. I agree with you that this could be a wake-up call for me, to turn into something positive. Thank you for opening my eyes to that perspective!

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You’re welcome. It’s the right way to see it. Our body is wise and give us signals. Only we can wait up to have the strength to overcome the storm and be reborn.