[Have Hope]

I lost my job today. They told me that my skill set doesn't match their needs.

In the very beginning, I knew that I could not measure up to their expectations. I stressed out SO much that I made myself completely sick. I took a month off for mental health reasons in the third week of employment.

Since then, and upon my return, my doctor recommended that I return to a less stressful, modified position.

So my company gave me easier tasks for the last year, and I never took on clients of my own.

My first review was horrible and said I wasn't meeting their expectations. Then my second review was far better, yet wasn't in writing. That was a red flag to me. My boss told me only verbally that I was now meeting the expectations. When I asked for that in writing, he only wrote a brief paragraph, yet did not include that part in writing.

I think they've wanted to let me go for a long time. My boss kept dangling clients like a carrot stick for months on end, without following through.

I took on other responsibilities and was doing fairly well at them. Still, I was not operating at the level they require for my particular role.

So, I've been let go. This is my fourth time being unemployed. I am panicking because it took a ridiculous number of interviews and rejections in the final round of interviews to finally land this job.

I am very worried & scared for my future. Any support you can offer would be hugely appreciated.

[SlumberKitty]

HUGS. So sorry to hear. That is tough indeed. I hope you can bounce on your feet soon. Hang in there.

[MuddyBoots]

Hey, you landed that job and you've landed jobs before, you'll land another again. Hopefully soon. You've got this

[divine1966]

I am so sorry. It’s very stressful. Do you qualify for unemployment?

[Have Hope]

Thank you everyone.

I SHOULD qualify for unemployment? I hope so! If I don't, I am screwed financially.

And I don't know how hard it will be for me to get another job. I had to take a step down in my last job, and take lower level responsibilities. I don't know how to explain this to prospective employers, or even if SHOULD explain that. I think it will hurt my application.. I don't know what to do!!!

[divine1966]

Were you fired or laid off? I think that’s the difference in determining unemployment qualifications.

[RollercoasterLover]

What prompted your job change that was a step down in responsibilities? Were you unemployed and took what you could find or did you make the change purposely?

I would practice answering the interview question "Why did you leave your last position?" It's common. I would suggest a simple non detailed answer like "the position I was hired to fill changed shortly after I began working for XYZ CO. My skill set wasn't the best fit for the modified position." From what you said, that's all true. It's also understandable that things just didn't fit right and lead to your job search. If there's followup such as what changed? The job responsibilities I expected were redefined and no longer aligned with my experience and strongest skills" then change to asking a question specific to the job as it relates to your skills. Something like what skills are critical to success here at 123 inc??

It sounds too like your last employer used a "no fault" reason for ending your employment. Regardless of what you think the reasons were or what they were thinking... the official reason is that your skills no longer matched the needs of your employer. You still have a dynamic skill set that has value to an employer.

I "officially" left my previous employer because my job relocated out of state and relocation wasn't best for my family at that time, And that's what I said in interviews. Reality was I hated the idiot I worked for and when the company moved 20 miles over the state line my commute in a different direction increased from 21 miles to 33 miles. But because the office moved over 50 miles and out of state, no one ever questioned me further.

[Bill3]

Hang in there! I think you have a lot to offer.

[Have Hope]

Originally Posted by RollercoasterLover

What prompted your job change that was a step down in responsibilities? Were you unemployed and took what you could find or did you make the change purposely?

I would practice answering the interview question "Why did you leave your last position?" It's common. I would suggest a simple non detailed answer like "the position I was hired to fill changed shortly after I began working for XYZ CO. My skill set wasn't the best fit for the modified position." From what you said, that's all true. It's also understandable that things just didn't fit right and lead to your job search. If there's followup such as what changed? The job responsibilities I expected were redefined and no longer aligned with my experience and strongest skills" then change to asking a question specific to the job as it relates to your skills. Something like what skills are critical to success here at 123 inc??

It sounds too like your last employer used a "no fault" reason for ending your employment. Regardless of what you think the reasons were or what they were thinking... the official reason is that your skills no longer matched the needs of your employer. You still have a dynamic skill set that has value to an employer.

I "officially" left my previous employer because my job relocated out of state and relocation wasn't best for my family at that time, And that's what I said in interviews. Reality was I hated the idiot I worked for and when the company moved 20 miles over the state line my commute in a different direction increased from 21 miles to 33 miles. But because the office moved over 50 miles and out of state, no one ever questioned me further.

Thanks for your reply.

I had to take a medical leave of absence in the beginning of my employment. When I returned, my doctor suggested that I return to a less stressful and modified position. So the position I was hired for originally involved working with clients. I ended up supporting my team instead, working with content, and not working with clients.

I don't think it's good for me to say that my job changed after I started working there. My original thought is to pretend like the job I ended up with is the job I was hired to do. I wasn't planning on telling employers that I supported my team. I was planning on telling them that I worked with content, which was the focus of my role. I don't want to have to explain that my position changed or lie about why it changed. I definitely don't want to reveal that I had to take a medical leave of absence.

I really feel screwed.

[Have Hope]

Originally Posted by Bill3

Hang in there! I think you have a lot to offer.

Thanks, @Bill3.

[divine1966]

Perhaps you describe your position as working with content. Because that’s what you did. It doesn’t matter what you were hired to do. Describe what you did. Medical leave us no one’s business unless medical condition is directly related to you seeking a different job.

[Have Hope]

Originally Posted by divine1966

Perhaps you describe your position as working with content. Because that’s what you did. It doesn’t matter what you were hired to do. Describe what you did. Medical leave us no one’s business unless medical condition is directly related to you seeking a different job.

That's what I think too. I don't think I should tell employers I had to take a medical leave and that my job changed as a result. Too much detail and personal information that could sway an employer to not hire me.

I did work with content in the end, so that's what I can focus the discussion on. It was a different kind of role than any I had carried previously, and I gained new skills working with content.

[Have Hope]

Only a year ago I had a hell of a time interviewing trying to find a job. I made it through like 8 interview processes, was in the final round that many times and got rejected that many times. I had to take tests and prepare a presentation. What if the same thing happens again? What if I’m in for total hell ahead? I don’t know if I can survive that again - not so soon.

[Have Hope]

I have been waking up in a panic every morning. I am not well. This is not good, and I am very scared.

[divine1966]

Did you apply for unemployment? Could you survive couple of months on unemployment? Could you ask your mom to help you out for a few months?

Talk to a landlord if there is a smaller place available. Sure they make people pay penalties. But you never know. Sometimes if you play things right you might not have to. I can tell you how we ended up not paying any penalties or remaining lease

Sell your ring. Now that expensive chair you bought your ex would come handy.

Make a post of renting your other room to someone. Find a roommate

If you don’t qualify for unemployment, go get two jobs, any jobs. Not high pay directorial jobs. At this time don’t look for fancy jobs. Any jobs would do for now. Clean houses. Wait tables. No matter. Just pay bills until something comes up.

You can do it

[Have Hope]

I applied for unemployment and also spoke with their office. They told me I qualify for benefits. I think I mentioned I took out a bank loan to make ends meet because I cannot pay all my bills on unemployment alone.

I cannot move, as moving costs money, money which I do not have. Plus, all one bedroom or studio apartments cost about what I am already paying in rent. I could potentially get a roommate - that's one possibility.

I also have a former colleague that I could potentially work with on the side to earn some extra money. I plan on asking him about it. He offered this to me a couple months ago, I declined at the time and said I wanted to keep the option open. I will contact him.

I could sell my engagement ring, but I thought I am supposed to wait until divorce is over?

And this time, I will approach my job search differently. I will take anything and cannot afford to pick and choose.

[divine1966]

Originally Posted by Have Hope

I applied for unemployment and also spoke with their office. They told me I qualify for benefits. I think I mentioned I took out a bank loan to make ends meet because I cannot pay all my bills on unemployment alone.

I cannot move, as moving costs money, money which I do not have. Plus, all one bedroom or studio apartments cost about what I am already paying in rent. I could potentially get a roommate - that's one possibility.

I also have a former colleague that I could potentially work with on the side to earn some extra money. I plan on asking him about it. He offered this to me a couple months ago, I declined at the time and said I wanted to keep the option open. I will contact him.

I could sell my engagement ring, but I thought I am supposed to wait until divorce is over?

And this time, I will approach my job search differently. I will take anything and cannot afford to pick and choose.

Are all divorce papers filed? Didn’t you sign everything? Financial papers are all done? Then I see no need to wait. You shouldn’t be selling things if divorce papers weren’t filed.

[Have Hope]

Originally Posted by divine1966

Are all divorce papers filed? Didn’t you sign everything? Financial papers are all done? Then I see no need to wait. You shouldn’t be selling things if divorce papers weren’t filed.

We're waiting for a confirmation from the courts that we have officially filed for divorce. Papers have been signed on both sides, though, and the paperwork was faxed to the court last Thurs.

[Have Hope]

Today, I have to say, that I feel much better. I woke up in a panic again as usual but feel hopeful and optimistic. I'm in touch with a couple recruiters, my former CEO will provide a positive reference, and I've submitted several applications already. I feel Ok today.

[Bill3]

.

[divine1966]

Great. You are being proactive. Good job getting it all done!!!!

[Have Hope]

Originally Posted by divine1966

Great. You are being proactive. Good job getting it all done!!!!

Thank you.

I even went to get my engagement ring appraised to sell. The jewelry buyer suggested I sell it privately for more money. He was only willing to offer a few hundred dollars! It was a $4500 ring!

[Have Hope]

I have to lie to prospective employers and tell them that I was laid off vs let go for other reasons. I also have to pretend that the job I did was the job I was hired to do and I have to hide the fact that I also supported my team in addition to my content responsibilities.

Yesterday was a good day and I felt much more ok with things. And today I’m not ok and I don’t feel ok with things.

I have to obtain a high enough salary to afford my rent and expenses and can’t flex on that. If I could at least lower my salary I could likely have more opportunities available to me. I feel inwardly that my current skill set doesn’t warrant the salary I need to ask for, although my last employer gave me that salary as a fair assessment of my market value given my years of experience in the industry.

I may need to complete a free online course to keep my knowledge fresh. I have memory issues and forget a lot that I’ve learned so I need to read up and keep my knowledge available to me.

Once again I'm scared. I need to take anti anxiety meds every day now to calm my nerves.

I can’t move because I don’t have the money to move. I could potentially get a roommate, but that is not appealing whatsoever. The last time I lived with a stranger it turned into a nightmare situation. My roommate was an awful person, and I didn’t know this beforehand.

I feel like the universe is handing me a no win situation.

I need to get interviews asap. I need to study up. I need to buckle down and problem solve.

I so wish I could lean on my husband for moral support but I cannot. I cannot open that door - that would be a huge mistake.

I have to turn my mentality around. I must in order to get through this successfully.

[AliceKate]

Not trying to be difficult here, but can't you move your stuff without hiring movers? Just wondering. It would be much cheaper.

[Have Hope]

Originally Posted by AliceKate

Not trying to be difficult here, but can't you move your stuff without hiring movers? Just wondering. It would be much cheaper.

I have heavy furniture that requires movers.