[idontknow13]

It has been more than 4 months that I have been in this horrible depression and suffering from crippling anxiety. I have done everything I was told to do, I see a therapist, my doctor on a regular basis. I have been to a psychiatrist for an evaluation. Now they are changing my meds after a lot of trials with different meds, went off sleeping pills etc...And nothing has changed, I am still in the same hole I was in...Wake up every morning with this feeling of dread, lie around the bed till noon, get up to lie down again in front of the tv...waiting for sleep to come...
Five months ago I was working at a full time job, taking care of my house and making sure my adult daughters and everyone else I care about was taken care of, leading a normal life as a functional adult. Now I have become an isolated, sad, unable to function childlike pathetic human being.
I want to beleive this new med will do the trick but I have also lost faith in meds and doctors. I see no light at the end of the tunnel. I am constantly thinking something bad will happen to the people I love, mainly my daughters, it is unbearable.
I have been thinking all day of writing this but why??? I dont know.... I cannot really describe the way I feel with the right words, another thing that has left me: my ability to communicate in a proper way...my ability to think....my ability to concentrate...to make rational decisions, actually any decisions...When will it stop???

[leacon]

I understand far too well the position you are in. I suspect you need to find something to do outside of the house. Maybe take a fun class or anything at all you would find fun. Anyway have a bunch of hugs from me.

[depressedalaskan]

Originally Posted by idontknow13

It has been more than 4 months that I have been in this horrible depression and suffering from crippling anxiety. I have done everything I was told to do, I see a therapist, my doctor on a regular basis. I have been to a psychiatrist for an evaluation. Now they are changing my meds after a lot of trials with different meds, went off sleeping pills etc...And nothing has changed, I am still in the same hole I was in...Wake up every morning with this feeling of dread, lie around the bed till noon, get up to lie down again in front of the tv...waiting for sleep to come...
Five months ago I was working at a full time job, taking care of my house and making sure my adult daughters and everyone else I care about was taken care of, leading a normal life as a functional adult. Now I have become an isolated, sad, unable to function childlike pathetic human being.
I want to beleive this new med will do the trick but I have also lost faith in meds and doctors. I see no light at the end of the tunnel. I am constantly thinking something bad will happen to the people I love, mainly my daughters, it is unbearable.
I have been thinking all day of writing this but why??? I dont know.... I cannot really describe the way I feel with the right words, another thing that has left me: my ability to communicate in a proper way...my ability to think....my ability to concentrate...to make rational decisions, actually any decisions...When will it stop???

So very sorry this has happend to you ((((idontknow13)))). Boy do I hear you and see you in me. It is so sad that we are living like this. I too ask the questions you ask. And I look for the answers everyday. Thank you for posting this, it sounded like it was hard for you to do. But we have to start somewhere. Be proud of youself for getting it out. We will all try to help you answer your questions. Hugs for your day.

[Naturefreak]

(((idontknow)))
What can I say to make you feel better .
Not just for the moment , but forever.
Just Hugs cause I honestly don't know.
Sorry

[susan888]

(((IDK)))

I'm so sorry you are not feeling better yet...anxiety is the worst feeling...You are in my thoughts and my prayers if that's OK. It's so hard to be in the dark place when you can't assume your natural role in the family and in life...I do know that..Hopefully you have supportive, loving people surrounding you.

Sending you BIG hugs (if OK) and a shoulder to cry on..

[Rohag]

Originally Posted by Depressedalaskan

Be proud of yourself for getting it out.

Yes, in view of the oppressive, confusing cloud under which you're working and the stigmas usually attached to these feelings, you may not now be able to feel proud for posting, but we can and do admire you.

Originally Posted by Idontknow13

...I have become an isolated, sad, unable to function childlike pathetic human being.

Wow. That's me. For better or worse, my drugged, apathetic system prevents me from feeling the full sting of that assessment. But I'm in something of a different place from you. I wish I could take the sting away, or at least distract you from it.

Distraction and self-distraction - those can be decent methods of coping with depression and anxiety. I'm sure your family, friends, cyber-friends and others will have plenty of suggestions.

I'm sorry your med trials have so far failed to find the mark. Psychotropic meds apparently have individualistic effects. What works for one won't work for or even hurt another. You may need a carefully tweaked combination of drugs; only time will tell.

Please forgive me if anything above insults your intelligence or triggers you. I wish you peaceful patience as you face this illness.