[Chimera1]

Hi,

I think I have always felt a little low. When thinking about special events in my past I always feel a little sad or bothered. There was rarely just a happy moment with no drama (holidays, wedding, etc).

Like I said, just slightly low. I've always had awful PMS that would often last longer than it should. After my third baby I had severe post pardum depression. Severe. I was near ending everything for me. I would see things that weren't there, cry, stare at nothing, etc. This lasted for quite a long time (I couldn't even get the energy to get help). Anyway, I finally got on Prozac and birth control and that saved my life. however, 4 yrs later, I feel like I have never recovered to my general low. I feel even lower. Which is not good.

I have a great life. Wonderful husband , kids, a new home, great church. No, I don't have any friends and I know that would help, but I can't seem to make any ever.

I don't take Prozac anymore (they continued the prescription for PMS), for it makes me very tired. I haven't been formally diagnosed with depression and, honestly, feel really uncomfortable going to the Dr. for it. My husband would support me, but I'd still feel embarrassed.

Okay....after writing this it's all very clear. Ugh. Thanks for letting me vent.

[Pomegranate]

Venting is good. Glad to be of help! Please keep coming back to vent. We do care, sometimes people just don't know what to say to be helpful.

I do strongly urge you to try and seek help again for your low moods. Give the new therapist or psychiatrist all the background you've given us here. They can only be as helpful as the info you give them on what's been happening with you and what's been wrong. Trying another antidepressant may prove helpful also. I wasn on several before I found one that worked well for me.

[*freak*]

Why would you feel uncomfortable in seeing a dr? There's nothing wrong with being depressed, you didn't ask for it and it's nothing to be ashamed of
Don't be afraid to ask for help.

In the meantime you can always post here if it helps. We all care and we'll listen, trying to help if we can

Please take care of yourself

[depressedalaskan]

I agree with (((((Pomegranate))))) & (((( *freak*)))). Do not be ashamed for being ill. If you had a heart problem you would already be at the hospital.

This may work for you or it may not. Print out your post and share it with your doctor. This works for me, I seem to be able to share more of my feelings here at PC with my friends than I can in the therapist office. At any rate be honest with your doctor if you intend to seek out help. Also remember we are here and we do understand how you feel. I myself have been fighting depression a long time. Hugs for your day.

[lynn09]

Hey, Chimera1. Welcome. Do not hesitate to go talk to the Doc about your depression - depression is NOT a character flaw, you know. You're a mature, responsible person taking charge of the quality of your life, and you're intelligent enough to know when to ask for help achieving the best quality of life possible. I empathize with you regarding your feelings about special occasions - holidays and special occasions were always a nightmare growing up in my home, and I wouldn't celebrate ANYTHING at all for many years - those days would just trigger all the horrible memories. Finally, one Christmas in 1986, I realized that the only way to get rid of those horrible memories was to overwrite them with good memories I created myself. So, from then on I have celebrated every holiday and special occasion the way I want to experience it and anyone who tries to mess it up for me is OUT! I have spent many, many holidays alone with my dog and cat - and we have a ball! I fix special meals, buy presents for me and them, play with them, sing, whatever, and I celebrate my birthday for a full 7 days. If other humans want to join in, they are welcome as long as they understand that this is how we do things in MY house - NO DRAMA ALLOWED. If I'm attending a celebration elsewhere and someone tries to mess it up with drama, I leave - leave the area, leave the room, or leave the place altogether - I'm just not going to put up with it and you shouldn't either. Take care of yourself and be as happy as you can possibly stand.