[Depressed Dear]

So, yesterday I told my I told my husband(which is a Dr.) that I was taking my med correctly and working very hard at dealing with this saddness. Well, Mr. Fixit told me to go take a walk and I needed to go to a Phy. Dr. I told him that I can not find one to see me for like 6mos. I will find one for you. So, he made calls and of course I was right it will be Feb. before somebody will see me. He never thinks I know what I am talking about. He called this friend that left one field of med. and went became a PDr. He told my husband that there is a huge shortage and he couldn't see me either. But, he would see me Dec. 1st. that was the soonest he could. He also told my husband that it was my meds. they were messed up. And this is suppose to make me feel better. I have to go 2 more weeks of feeling like this one of which is Thanksgivening (week long vacation to my parents with all 3 kids by myself). Then it isn't like he is going to giive me a magical pill and I will feel like my old self on Dec. 2nd. What do I do? It is so hard "acting happy" when all I want to do is hide in the closet. I am no thinking of killing myself so I can't get help. Well at this rate it is the only thing left that I am not thinking about. Got a lot of social events going on this weekend. My Husband is just thinking that I need to take a deep breath and relax and it will be over before I know it.

Welcome, Depressed Dear. Perhaps you might go to the emergency room to get your meds straightened out? I would not hesitate to do so if I felt I needed to.

Please continue to post. Let us know how you are doing. Good luck!

[Rohag]

Hello, Depressed Dear!

Originally Posted by Depressed Dear

I have to go 2 more weeks of feeling like this one of which is Thanksgivening (week long vacation to my parents with all 3 kids by myself). ... What do I do? It is so hard "acting happy" when all I want to do is hide in the closet.

If I read your post correctly, this week-long vacation to your parents with your three children will be exceptionally taxing in your current condition, yes? Do you have the strength to impress the severity of your state on your husband and parents? Can you tell them (realizing the difficulty of telling people you want to please something that may not please them) you are not capable of handling the vacation, or, at very least, not capable of handling it by yourself alone?

[Naturefreak]

Depressed Dear
I'd prefer to act happy as I usually do than hiding in the closet.
You still can get help even though you're not having suicidal thoughts. Maybe Rohag has a point , you may need some help handling the vacation. Anyhow , please take care and let us know how you make out.

[Depressed Dear]

I am so glad that y'all read my post and get it. I am going on a week long trip by myself with 3 kids. I really don't want to go but, if I don't they will hold it against me. My husband gets it for about a second. Then it is back to my list of things I need to get done for him and the family. Nobody knows any of my issues except my husband. A few years ago I told a very close friend a few of the things that was going on and she thought I was acting like a spoiled brat. The way she seen it was I had the perfect life, great kids, husband that let me stay at home, husband that provided very well for our family, great friends, I got to travel, and everybody is healthy. Why on earth are you acting all depressed? I left her house vowing to take this issue to the grave with me I would never tell anyone ever again. I would expect this same reaction from my family and also from my husbands but, when I got it from a friend.....I was floored and just decided maybe she was right. So the act goes on. When I get really down like this I just keep to myself and pray it goes away. It is very hard and takes a physical toll on me.

[NuckingFutz]

How about some therapy in the meantime? Bet you can find someone to do some short term therapy until you can get your meds straight. It might even be advisable since the holidays are coming up...there is family to deal with, people's schedules get all messed up all that crazy stuff. Nah, i wouldn't try the closet route...i doubt it is a valid treatment and would just get your clothing all wrinkled. Also, this place has a lot of really great caring smart creative knowledgeable empathetic people on here. Plus there is a mobile interface that will let you post right from your phone so you can even carry us around in your pocket with you. We can be part of your treatment plan through your vacation.

[Rhiannonsmoon]

Depressed Dear,

You have some really good advice here. I just wanted to add that we all support each other, and we carry each other through some of the darkest days. Now that you are a member of the psychcentral family that includes helping you too.

Never just act happy. That will lead to an overload and they aren't good. If people ask how you are, tell them you're feeling unwell at the moment. You don't have to tell them anything else. But if you tell them you're unwell, they will be more considerate.

Many people react to mental illness negatively, but have all the compassion in the world for someone with a physical illness they can see. They don't realise that they are one and the same. They don't get that the mental illness has a terrible physical affect.

Hang in there and push through every day. I do know how hard it is, and I do know how long the road looks. But every single step gets you further along that road and closer to feeling better, even if you can't feel it right at this moment,

((((hugs))))
Rhiannon

[Depressed Dear]

[quote=NuckingFutz;1197188]How about some therapy in the meantime?

I called a place today but a machine picked up and I hung up.

Very busy today getting ready for this darn weekend. Husband thinks that I will feel a lot better if we just go spend the day on a boat with him 2 of the 3 kids. Maybe he is just as crazy as I am. Then, after a day of boating, Sunday he is getting a award, a night to get dressed up so people can get all in my personal space. I start sweating just thinking about it.

Also, I do go hide in my closet it's cool and dark and that's where I can always find my 2 boys(cats). I only go in there if I am feeling like I need to take a "time out" usually when family/people are in my house. Other wise me and the boys just go get in my bed and cover up our heads.

[tunesinger]

Depressed Dear,

You are doing so many things right, you've talked to your husband, you've got an appointment, you take a time out (although I'm not sure about the closet thing, people are coming out of them, to go in seems pointless...just a joke) and you are still functioning. Having a plan and a backup plan is important. Many great suggestions. Take this forum on your trip, if you aren't feeling well and your relatives ask, tell them the PHYSICAL feelings that go with depression. I bet when you stop and think about it, you'll have quite a few and then maybe you can be excused to go lie down for a bit. Plan B, Any Dr. can write for antidepressants. Just changing them from one to another can help. Try your regular doctor or ER if you don't think you are handling things well. As always, just do what's in front of you. That's all that is required.

[NuckingFutz]

Now aren't you glad you found us? We won't leave you hanging or just give you an impersonal response. I have 2 kitties too...they help with the depression don't they? Maybe you can try and find a therapist again on monday. Hang in there and keep posting and take one moment at a time.