[Overcastbutclearing]

It is very interesting to me that this forum will close a post when people are just expressing how they feel.
I can see deleting a reply if needed. I can see a moderator sending a PM to a member to see if they are okay or ask them what made them respond in such a way...
But to just lock the post when people are getting their feelings out and dealing with the subject and maybe even their own demons is beyond me.

The reality folks is people feel like doodoo, they don't always respond in accordance with perhaps the way this site wants them to but they do respond from the heart.
And, frustration comes when people are thinking the very same thing that the original poster posted and then their thoughts start spinning out of control.
If you are going to lock posts, then lock this site.
Because the reality is...we are onliners with no contracts to safety, no one to really reach out to in time of need and no one even knows who we really are.
So, let the thoughts fly or shut down your site!

[nothemama8]

[vacantangel]

It's ok Susan. I should be used to it by now. This just proves once and for all, I will NEVER post about myself ever again. If anybody ever wants to know how I'm doing, they'll just have to PM me cuz I'll say 'fine' in the forums and chat, unless I end up turning my PM off again too.

[oksomaybeimnuts]

the locking of the thread to which you refer also baffles me.

[Hope4me2]

what is going on...cant people voice how they feel here anymore? I thought that is what this place was for....maybe I am wrong...
so sorry vacant that you feel you cant tell us how your doing anymore....that is sooooooooo SAD and upsets me immensely.... just do not understand any of this....

[oksomaybeimnuts]

bump

[neri]

errrrr...? I wonder about this too. And why did the post, where angel asked why did the first post get locked, infact get locked too???? who is doing this and why?

[nothemama8]

Locking threads and deleting threads (when a person recieved 2 mods okay) is not supportive and can lead to hurt, confusion, anger, and ppl being afraid to post period, what ever happened to freedom of speech?
Angie

Folks,

I am not writing this to invite a barage of PMs or to propagate posts of a non supportive nature.

This is part of the Community Guidelines when you join up to post. As part of such <font color="blue">"You agree that the Webmaster, administrator and moderators of this forum have the right to remove, edit, move or close any topic at any time should they see fit."</font>

Any digging of the archives shows that administrative actions are not held in public here for all to see. There are plenty of alternative mental health boards that use that method for handling administratives issues.

In the time I've been here there have been a handful of incidents that created public clamor for various reasons. I appreciate that a moderator or administrator came forth and said that it was not a public concern and it was being attended to in private with the involved parties. I have no need to know what is between members here and an administrator or moderator as that is their business.

From the many years that Doc John has been running online sites I have faith he knows more about this community dynamic than most and that he does not act wantonly in his administrative actions.

Please try to understand that not every administrative action is going to be explained out or posted about at length. That is not how this board is run from what I have seen of it over the time I've spent participating. I can understand the reasoning behind this thread but I also wish you all could try to understand this from another perspective.

Thank you all for your time reading this.

[SeptemberMorn]

What I understand is that someone has had it in for VacantAngel for quite a while. Maybe you're taking your freedom to lock threads a little too seriously!

[darkeyes]

No one has had "it in for VacantAngel", in admin. or mod. except "Angel" herself, numerous amounts of the members, here and other sites she goes to have tried over, and over, to talk to her, support, etc.
No one is using freedom to lock threads, too seriously, just following the guidelines.
If you are having a problem with things, pm one of the admins/mods and perhaps they can help you with this.

Please take care,

DE

[darkeyes]

Just a little clarification, not all posts in fact many are not closed/deleted by admin or mods., but are asked to do so by the original poster, and we comply.
I understand your frustration, we are at times. I believe there are Guidelines for this website posted and a disclaimer, I feel if many of us go back and read it, things will be clearer to understand, if not pm admin. to help you understand.
I understand everyone seems so jumpy, so I want you to know this reply is NOT intended to insult or agitate, so "no jumping" please.

Take care now,

DE

[SeptemberMorn]

Mmmmm... beg to differ, Hun. The rest I'll take up in PM.

[dayzee9]

AMEN!!!!

w/((((((((((hugs for all)))))))))DAYZEE9

[neri]

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
No one has had "it in for VacantAngel", in admin. or mod. except "Angel" herself, numerous amounts of the members, here and other sites she goes to have tried over, and over, to talk to her, support, etc.
No one is using freedom to lock threads, too seriously, just following the guidelines.
If you are having a problem with things, pm one of the admins/mods and perhaps they can help you with this.

Please take care,

DE

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

i'm sorry but in my opinion this very post makes it sound like u had something personally against angel

i'm aware that very sentence would in mod's opinion belong to PM, but i don't "do" them and i'm just stunned that a person who has been given such power over this site could say that about a fellow member

plz don't put me on your black list for saying that
lol sorry i just can't shut up

to all, if this post is locked, it will probably be because of me

[LMo]

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
It's ok Susan. I should be used to it by now. This just proves once and for all, I will NEVER post about myself ever again. If anybody ever wants to know how I'm doing, they'll just have to PM me cuz I'll say 'fine' in the forums and chat, unless I end up turning my PM off again too.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

Angel, don't you think that kind of reaction is a little extreme? I mean, you either want the support or you don't. Clamming up doesn't help anything (even though I agree that locking the thread was a little odd).

[cat_eye]

I like this site the way it is...

[dayzee9]

How nice to go throug life w/ rose-colored glasses, isn't it?

Personally, I prefer BluBlocker's you can disappear when you put them on!

Reality Bites, but cannot be that ignored! DAYZEE9

[darkeyes]

I think you are reading something into this, that isn't there, and that is sad if that you misinterpret things in that way.
Seems you are having a problem with this reply, I don't get it either, I do not see where "I have it in for VA", I've never bothered her, or had the time to do so and really have no desire to bother anyone in crisis. I do not have "it in for this person", so you can eliminate me from your hit list.
BTW Yes, your right this should have been a pm as well as yours. No, I do not feel I carry any power, we are not "police", ha!ha!

Take care,
DE

[oksomaybeimnuts]

i mean no disrespect with this but i need a clarification-you speak of numerous other sites that Angel has visited and her behavior there. should i now wonder if what i do on another site is being carried back here for certain people to see? this is very confusing to me

[Overcastbutclearing]

Hey People,
Take your beef with how your feel about PM's. VA, and anything else in your replies that have nothing to do with my original post of "freedom of speech" and how this site is handled by moderators who have no professional schooling in pyschology.
Because, you are eventually going to get my post locked and I ain't having it!

[nothemama8]

Susu, sorry your thread got highjacked, as I said on page 1 I'am in agreement with what you said, but also can now see (a little) the mods side, still would be nice to have explaination of why they must lock a thread so no hard feelings happen
Angie

[oksomaybeimnuts]

i'm sorry sj i didn't mean to hijack your thread- i do believe my concern is about my freedom of speech - has nothing to do with others but the fact that i have concerns as to whether i am free to speak my mind here and at other sites without recourse.

hey all...

Im always a champion of the underdog.. but I really feel that we shouldn't consider someone else's behavior on other sites here. No one else here knows about someone's behavior on other sites, and to be fair, I think people should be given a chance to changed and judged on the behavior on our site only. With all that said...what I think doesnt matter. I love this site, but I will always speak when I don't believe in the way things are going. Total blind support to anything is just crazy. Also...as a parent. I want to be the type of parent who can explain, apologize if needed and be open minded to the decisions I make for my child. This gives children saftey that they aren't dealing with dictator parents. Anyways.. maybe those are just my issues..but when people say "What I say...goes.. I have the power.." it just rubs me the wrong way. It would be easier and healthier to say. I was intending to protect you from x, y, and z. This is what I thought best. I believed that everyone would agree b/c rule #4 says... Do you disagree that this post broke that rule? Anyways.. thats just me..

[darkeyes]

No, of course not. If members have mentioned they knew or know of others from other sites, that is of their own doing.
If they wish for others not to see that, then it is up to those people not to post/reply/chat forums telling anyone.
When things are posted, replied or on public chat forums, the screen is seen by anyone that comes here.
I would suggest if anyone does not want anyone to know certain things, they should not write it were it is publicly displayed, no one sees PM's so members have that option. We all have another option, when we come across a post that triggers us, we can click pass, and choose rather to read it or not, helps avoid conflicts.
I think for all of us it is time to move on, rehashing, and brooding over this stuff, isn't doing anyone any good, just going in a stagnate circle, not going forward or supportive to any of us.

Let's have some PEACE.

Best wishes,

DE