Depressed About A Girl

I haven't been on this site lately, but I just am like overwhelmed with stuff and really need a way to just get it all out.

So I am a senior in High School now; Last year there was this girl who I liked. I didn't even know her name, just one of those girls where she is so amazing to me I am so attracted to her, but I don't even know her. But this year I have been seeing her around school, not like talking or anything, but just seeing her walk past, and of course like for everything, I feel invisible because she never notices me. I even added her as a friend on Facebook yesterday (I found her name) and she was like "Do I know you?" as if she has never seen me before, Even though we have made eye contact times before. But anyways, back to what I was saying.

I have pointed her out to about 3 or 4 of my friends and each of them didn't think she was attractive/hot; cute for a better word, but I really think she is. Any other girl at school I see, I am like, "Oh, she is pretty" but thats it, I am not drawn to her so much, but with this girl, it's different. I can't even stand to look at her without getting all depressed about it. But that is where I get stuck at. She always hangs around this one guy, holding hands, and sharing his drink in the mornings, not like I am a stalker, ha, but I do pass by her in the mornings to get to class.

Like I said, i can't even stand to think about her anymore or see her, she is just so beautiful. Just thinking about her makes me go spiraling into a depressive state that i can't get out of. I feel stuck, then I started cutting a few weeks ago again because of this, and suicide kinds of thoughts are constantly on my mind.

I know one other girl who likes me, and I kind of like her too, but I don't want to go out with her because that won't make me any happier. I will still only be thinking of that other girl.

I hate feeling like this. My schoolwork is also getting worse because I really just don't care anymore about things.

Does anyone have any suggestions to help me stop wanting to be with her and to stop thinking about her? Thats definitely not what I want to do, but the only thing I can think of to help me. I am also very very shy, and have bad anxiety, so it's hard anyways for me to even get a girlfriend, yet alone this girl I like.

It's a lose lose situation either way.

((((Zloppy))))

Thank you for reaching out and posting. I hear you and I am sorry you are feeling so bad. I can hear you like her, and there is nothing wrong with that. But allowing someone to consume you is not good for you. I know that sometimes we do want things and seems like nothing else will do, but have you heard the saying that if you like something let it go, if it comes back to you it is yours, if it doesn't it was never meant to be.

I believe that there is someone out there for everyone. Sometimes it takes time to find them. If we wait, it will come. If we reach too far ahead, we may lose the very thing we were reaching for.

I am not saying that she is not the one or that you should not like her. But have you tried to talk to her? I know that anxiety is not fun, but take a chance and just see what happens. Start out with just saying hi. I know it is not easy believe me. But with practice you can do this.

Just because someone else does not think she is pretty, does not mean you cannot. Just give it time and see where it goes. Things will work out just the way they are suppose to.

Please keep posting and keep us informed on how you are doing. Know we care and are thinking of you. Sending you gentle hugs.

dps

My suggestion is to become friends with the girl you said liked you. Maybe go on a few dates. It doesn't matter if your lukewarm feelings for her do not change because you'll be gaining social confidence with girls by spending time with her. Eventually, you might gain enough self-respect to have a better chance with that one special girl who you adore.

Yeah I see both of your points.

Darkpurple: I haven't talked to her any, but I want to try to say hi on Facebook to her and start a conversation going.

Trevorzero: I am already good friends with that girl who likes me, but I don't want to be in a relationship that isn't true, I don't want to force it.

Thanks for the replies.

Just as an update... I decided to ask the girl I already knew liked me out. We are now going out and are getting along so well. I have never been this happy in a long time.

I'm glad to see you are trying things with the other girl. Have you resolved your interest for this mystery girl? Coming from a very shy girl I suggest next time you have these feelings you tell them. I can't express how nice it is to hear someone thinks you're "beautiful" or something... even if it's an awkward conversation with someone you don't know, it just makes your entire day brighter. Everyone needs that.

What a nice resolution. I hope that it continues to go well for you. Relationships are SOOOOO hard to work out, eh? HUGGSSSS to you both.

Yeah I got over that "mystery girl" I even see now that it never would have worked out. She is too much of a stuck up you know what. I realize it wouldn't have lasted long at all.

I'm glad you have decided to go out with the girl who likes you.. Her friendship comes from the heart..Give it time and she will be all you think of..How is your school work coming now that you aren't down anymore?? Maybe you could get together with your GF and study.. It will give you more time together..