Trying to Lift Myself Up

My depression has been surfacing repeatedly lately, no matter what I try to do to keep myself balanced. I am considering a low-dose zoloft, but I am very reluctant, as are my friends.

Tried to write a little something for myself, and felt a touch better after reading it. It's unlikely that I'll stick with it for too long, but here's hoping.

"In order to defeat something like depression, one would need to find strength. But for those whom strength is not inherent, where can it be found?

Some might say that in a time of weakness, one should rely on the strength of others... Friends and family who want to help. But what do you do when others' strengths are not a resource for you?

Can one summon strength from within themselves, even while in a desolate state of weakness and despair? And what does it mean to be strong, anyway?

It is to persevere, no matter circumstances you are faced with. To keep your chin up, despite the many valid reasons you find to hide away. To find solace in the few comforts you have, and to try to better your situation as best you can. To seize control over the few things you can still maintain, though your life may seem to be spinning out of control. To recognize and validate the strength you already possess to have come through any adversities that have already befallen you. To get up each day, promising yourself to make it as good as you can. To continue working toward accomplishments, even if they are only a small fraction of what you could otherwise achieve. And doing anything you can, even though it may not be magnificent, or extraordinary.

Because even your minimum effort is still an effort, nonetheless."

Hi Easy... welcome to PC. I can relate to your thought process here and the reoccuring depression.

I would add.... giving yourself credit for any accomplishment even if it is just getting out of bed or brushing your teeth. Give step by step credit. It is one way to keep yourself in the moment which helps to settle the over thinking. Acknowledge the depression and remind yourself how it tends to blur and put a negative spin on everything. Breaks from depression always bring that home as truth. Remember this while you ride the wave.

I also find it helpful to drop the word 'try' when I am depressed. I just find it fails to give me the power I need in the worst of the moments. Instead I make declarations based on what I want to be feeling in the moment. 'I am... I can... I will... those kinds of starts seem more empowering for me. Like my favourite quote... don't just weather the storm but dance in the rain. Don't analyse the storm but rather make the most of a tough situation.

Wishing you well. Hope you are feeling better soon.

Hi Easy to Get Down, I can relate to your name.Its Great to have you on here,I am sorry your going through so much depression, its not a easy thing ,but here you can find alot of help,everyyone is wonderful here! Also,i teared up by what you wrote, your a very good writer!

((((Easy)))) Welcome, and best wishes.

"Even your minimum effort is still an effort, nonetheless." How true! If on a really bad day, all I can do is wash a load of laundry, hey, it beats doing nothing, and I can feel I've accomplished something.

That was a very good statement of purpose. It would be great if it could find a permanent home somewhere here.

Thank you, Easytogetdown, for your wonderful post.

Be well.

Hi Easytogetdown,

I'm sorry that you have the depression resurfaced. Writing certainly helps you to put your feelings down on paper. On the rough days you have to just get through them as best you can, and on the better days do what you can and are able to do. I wish you well and positive vibes.

Hi ((Easytogetdown)),
this was a wonderful first post and welcome to PC. I think you said some very inspirational things. I like your name also and it got me thinking - it is 'easy to get down' and criticize ourselves rather than the daunting task of 'raising ourselves up'. For me, I've learned my greatest life lessons during my darkest moments and I've realized my greatest strengths exist during my weakest moments. Hey maybe one day this will become a famous quote LOL. Best of luck in feeling better and good luck here at PC.

Hi there "Easytogetdown".

I go through what you are going through regularly, and one of things you have to do, is force yourself to do a task, whether it be cleaning, washing the dishes. Sometimes I even have to give myself a mental slap around the face, and force myself to go outside n pop to the shops, and when I've done this, I feel a sense of acheivement. I often put some music on, which forces me to change my mood, something with an upbeat tempo helps. You also have to tell yourself, that you have just as much right, to be part of society, as anyone else does.

How are you doing, Easytogetdown?