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  #1  
Old Jan 22, 2010, 07:00 PM
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aimeesh aimeesh is offline
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So I was listening to the two radio talk hosts talking and all of a sudden they brought up postpartum depression. one guy was all educational about it and the other was cracking jokes at the subject, calling people like ME "raving lunatic *****"(es). It wouldn't have hurt so bad except BF TURNED IT UP AND LAUGHED AT THE JOKES. He knows what I'm going through and he knew he was laughing at jokes made about people like me when he knows how bad im hurting.

im not doing okay at ALL right now.
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Radio Talk Show Hit A Sore Subject For Me

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  #2  
Old Jan 22, 2010, 07:58 PM
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Elysium Elysium is offline
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(((((Aimeesh)))))

I'm so sorry that your BF was so insensitive to your feelings and issues. It's understandable why you would be upset over this.

Is it possible to discuss this with him and let him know how his response to the topic made you feel. And maybe ask him what makes him feel like it's something to laugh about.

It is very possible that he doesn't relate well to the topic and doesn't have as deep an understanding as he could have. He could be attempting to vent his distress over your Depression by using humor and may not understand how much this hurt you.

I encourage you to share your feelings with him to help him know when that humor may/may not be appropriate.

As for the radio hosts...you could always send them an email explaining your disdain for the one host's inappropriate behavior...or file a complaint.

Mostly though...just keep your head up. Anyone that lives with PPD is very strong. It's the ones who feel they need to denigrate people for it who are weak.
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Radio Talk Show Hit A Sore Subject For Me
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lynn P.
  #3  
Old Jan 22, 2010, 08:10 PM
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tryingtobeme tryingtobeme is offline
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I'm so sorry he did this to you.

I too went through postpartum depression. It is horrible when people just don't understand. Take care and this will pass in time.
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lynn P.
  #4  
Old Jan 22, 2010, 08:19 PM
sanityseeker sanityseeker is offline
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I too am really sorry aimeesh that you were put though that kind of ridicule. I remember when I went through it I had zero tolerance for anyone thinking it something to be joked about. It is bloody painful on so many levels. They have know idea. I feel your pain and I hope it gets easier for you soon. It does pass though you need to takes extra care to take special care of yourself so that it doesn't trigger new forms of depression that can hold you in an even firmer grip.

There may come a time when you will see the humour in such jokes but certainly not when you are in its grip. It is very likely your bf is getting some relief from the humour but if it is at your expense it can't be worth it in the end. I get a lot of that now related to menopause jokes and they aren't very funny either.

I guess I can appreciate how hard it may be for our significant others to be around us when we are going through these difficult times. I did talk to my partner about it and I don't think he ever really got it but at least he watched himself around me and saved the jokes for when I was way out of earshot or years later when I had some distance from the suffering.

Don't be too hard on your bf but be sure to let him know how it hurts to listen to people making fun of something that for you is extremely difficult and painful. These things don't happen to men for a reason. They have nowhere near the strength of mind or body to survive one week of it.

Stay strong.... we get it. They may never but we get it. Hope that helps a little.
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lynn P.
  #5  
Old Jan 22, 2010, 08:21 PM
TheByzantine
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Sorry, aimeesh. Your friend has a lot of growing up to do.
  #6  
Old Jan 23, 2010, 03:38 AM
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Hopeless_2010 Hopeless_2010 is offline
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Aimeesh I have been there too PPD is horrible. People don't understand unless they have been through it. I know when I first started showing symptoms I knew what was going on and went to my doc. HE was a HE and didn't seem to care so that is when I switched and started seeing a female. Unless you have gone through or are going through it...they just don't get it.

Can you contact the radio station and tell them how you feel about their show? Maybe you pointing out what happend and how it effected you then they will show more sensitivity about such things.

Hang in there and know that your NOT alone
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  #7  
Old Jan 23, 2010, 05:18 AM
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aimeesh aimeesh is offline
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i honestly dont care about the talk show hosts, i am all about freedom of speech.... i was more venting about the hurt it caused me when my BF found it humorous too.

which btw now he doesnt even want to be my BF, so you can see why. now im just a dumb ugly *****.
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Radio Talk Show Hit A Sore Subject For Me
  #8  
Old Jan 23, 2010, 11:32 AM
sanityseeker sanityseeker is offline
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aimeesh... you are none of those things. I am so sorry you are being hurt by the immaturity of others. This is not about you. You deserve to be supported not made the butt of a joke. Your friend needs to grow up and get himself informed. We need to stick him in a room with a hundred women with PPD and lets through in a few with PMS and see if he can find his way out again. He is being a jerk and looking for an excuse to remain a boy. Sorry but seriously this is not about you it is about him.

The voice of depression is confusing you right now. Again this is not about you. You are going through a really hard time and your support is no support at all. I hope you can find someone to spend some time with today who can affirm you. I hope you can find the strength from within yourself to push the voice of depression and your friend away for a while and focus on your beauty. You are a mother of a beautiful baby and that is all that you need to be right now.

If I were your mother I would whopp that boy upside the head and scoop you out for a day at the spa and remind you that you are a beautiful sweet and lovely woman who has done the most amazing of things. You have given new life to the world and that new life is precious. Anyone who treats you with anything less than kindness needs to get an adjustment.

wishing you well and I really hope you can start to feel better.
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lynn P.
  #9  
Old Jan 23, 2010, 07:07 PM
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lynn P. lynn P. is offline
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I think he needs to stop verbally abusing you or you will tell him "you don't want to be HIS girlfriend. This needs to stop period. Regarding that radio show - those hosts are ignorant idiots. I've noticed radio shows are getting more rude - I bet they recieved alot of complaints. Post partum depression is a very serious medical condition caused by an imbalance of hormones which affects the chemicals in the brain. It must be treated with medicatiion and therapy. I have 0 tolerance for anyone who downgrades another person. I would like to see any man go through what we go through to have a baby. I would like to see how they would feel if their wives went through this. My brothers wife had it very bad 20 yrs ago and he supported her all the way. He worked during the day, came home and cooked, cleaned and took care of the kids until she felt better. This is what a woman needs when she's having a hard time. Please Aimeesh, seriously look at this BF and think -is he good for you? I hope things improve.
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  #10  
Old Jan 25, 2010, 12:06 PM
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tryingtobeme tryingtobeme is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by aimeesh View Post
i honestly dont care about the talk show hosts, i am all about freedom of speech.... i was more venting about the hurt it caused me when my BF found it humorous too.

which btw now he doesnt even want to be my BF, so you can see why. now im just a dumb ugly *****.
I am sorry about your BF. Men don't understand, they have nothing to compare it not. He doesn't have any right to do that to you.

Please don't say you are a...well you know what you said, I'm not going to repeat it because I don't think that is true.

You are going through a very rough time and PPD is very hard. I would suggest go to a good T, if you don't already have one, let a T help you through, get some meds if you are not against them either. You can and will get through. PPD does pass but I know the hurt runs and feels so deep. Just do what you can for that baby of yours. He/she needs you...take care of yourself. I know it's easy for me to say not to worry about BF, I know that hurts even more....so...just be safe with yourself and your baby.

Take care and lots of and
  #11  
Old Jan 25, 2010, 12:08 PM
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tryingtobeme tryingtobeme is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lynn P. View Post
I think he needs to stop verbally abusing you or you will tell him "you don't want to be HIS girlfriend. This needs to stop period. Regarding that radio show - those hosts are ignorant idiots. I've noticed radio shows are getting more rude - I bet they recieved alot of complaints. Post partum depression is a very serious medical condition caused by an imbalance of hormones which affects the chemicals in the brain. It must be treated with medicatiion and therapy. I have 0 tolerance for anyone who downgrades another person. I would like to see any man go through what we go through to have a baby. I would like to see how they would feel if their wives went through this. My brothers wife had it very bad 20 yrs ago and he supported her all the way. He worked during the day, came home and cooked, cleaned and took care of the kids until she felt better. This is what a woman needs when she's having a hard time. Please Aimeesh, seriously look at this BF and think -is he good for you? I hope things improve.
Right on Lynn. Me feelings exactly...
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lynn P.
  #12  
Old Jan 25, 2010, 04:32 PM
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amante amante is offline
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Aimeesh,
I agree with Lynn, you really are having alot of issues with this BF, I've read some of your other posts. You need to ask yourself what positive things he is bringing into your world and life. I'm guessing not a lot right now. I know you have a child, you must focus on you and your baby, I think you could benefit from a wide distance between you and this BF right now. Your PPD is not being helped by this BF. Sending hugs your way.
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