heavy

Why am I down all of a sudden? I was fine today. In fact, I was in a better than average mood. And then, I was just lying here, relaxing and watching tv, and suddenly ... I'm empty. I'm empty and hollow and I can't figure out why. It's not the same as my depression usually is. Usually I feel something. I feel despair. I feel loneliness and ANGUISH. But right now ... absolutely nothing, just this sense that I'm heavier than I was five minutes ago and that I don't want to move, ever again...

What is going on?!

Sometimes I feel that way as a prelude to a panic attack. When it happens, I ground, look around and to see that I am safe and as calmly as possible let the feeling go its course rather than fighting it.

Good luck.

((((justfloating))))

Thank you for reaching out. Sometimes that can happen and it just does not make sense but there is a reason somewhere. Sometimes for me when it gets to be night the depression that did not feel so bad during the day seems to take on another life at night. Recognizing it is there is a good thing. I am sorry you are feeling this.

Try to do something kind for you. Listen to your heart. Maybe you were really tired. Sometimes when I am really tired it can affect how I feel. I am glad you reached out and I hope the morning will find you feeling better. Please let us know how you are doing. We do care and you are important. Sending gentle hugs and loving thoughts. Always.

dps

I understand what you are going through. I'm BP and usually just plain old depressed. But last week I was totally numb to everything. Numb - no feelings what so ever. I didn't feel happy, sad, or depressed. Just down and numb. All I could do was ride it out. Now today, Friday, I feel okay. Happy in fact which is a rare thing for me. All you can do it not be afraid, just ride it out. I hope I was able to help...

Strange how quickly our emotions can change. Some days start out great and for no reason go belly up. That sucks. Its better when they start out down and get better. They do happen, I had one this week. Couldn't explain that one either. They just happen. How are you doing now?

((((((justfloating)))))
Hope you feel better soon and that this heaviness lifts

(((((Rebecca)))) Could this heaviness be part of grieving for your grandfather? As I wrote before, I am finding grief triggering my depression big time. Take care of yourself.

I know what you mean - moods can change in an instant. I'm sorry that I don't have any miracle cure, sending hugs to you

((((justfloating))))

Just wanted to ask how you are feeling? Thinking of you and sending you gentle hugs and loving thoughts. ALways.

dps

((((((((((everyone)))))))))))

Thanks for all your hugs and support, all.

My moods have been fluctuating for the last couple of weeks. It's not as awful as it used to be, but it's annoying and makes my daily life that much more difficult. Maybe I am still grieving for my grandfather, I don't know. It has stopped hurting to think of him, and I haven't cried since the funeral last week. I feel more peaceful about the whole thing. I take comfort from the fact that he's not suffering any more, and that he's in a much better place now.

Overall, I'm doing better. I'm feeling more alive than I was. I've made a coffee date this week with a friend because I can sense myself trying to isolate again, so I'm trying to get on top of that and force myself to get out every day even if it's just for a quick walk for coffee and back. I've been waiting for a new book by my favourite author to come out, and I was complaining to a friend a while ago that it comes out over a month later in the UK than it does in Canada, so she mailed me a copy. Every time I pick up the book I'm reminded that someone cares about me enough to remember something I said months ago, and then is willing to ship it to me overseas. If I have friends like that -- not to mention the support of all the wonderful people here at PC -- how can the heaviness last for long?

((((justfloating))))

Thank you for letting us know how you are doing. I am glad you are feeling somewhat better. Know that we are here for you and we care so much. Please keep posting as you need to and can. We are walking here with you. Sending gentle hugs and lovong thoughts. Love you. Always.

dps