Unwanted

I can never be good enough. Not for my parents, my family, nor my friends. I feel like a burden to everybody I know. I go to school at a horrible horrible place during the week, then on the weekend juggle my annoying self between parents that dislike me. Cousins that are annoyed by me, and friends that I will never be good enough for.

Both of my YOUNGER brothers have perfect vision, are mentally sound, and have movie-star good looks. I on the other hand... have 20/200 (if not worse by now) vision, have all kinds of mental issues, and while decently fit, not very attractive at all. What the **** did I do wrong? I will never look good without plastic surgery, I will never see well without lasek. I will never have social prowess. So what the **** is the point?

I talked to a psychiatrist that told me I am not a good candidate for anti depressants. That I just need a purpose in life. Well gee, thanks doc, I'll get right on finding that, as soon as I can motivate myself to get out of bed without thinking to myself "I don't want to be alive."

Hi Jmall, you are sounding very hard on yourself. Maybe you can go to a different psychiatrist that may be a better fit for you. shaggy

The only person you have to be "good enough for" is yourself, if you can feel that in both your head and your heart that is what matters the most. I would start there and worry about what others thing latter on, if at all.

I would find another pdoc. That one doesn't sound like a very good one or one who is willing to work with you. Don't look down on yourself. You are just as special as your brothers and the rest of your family. If your friends don't think you are good enough then they are not your friends to begin with. Surround yourself with people who really do care!

Competition with others is useless there will always be someone richer, smarter, etc.,etc....than you. How about simply being the best person for who YOU want to be. Ignore what others think you should do or be. Who do YOU want to be; what do you want to do in life? Think about Helen Keller. Wow. I survived a childhood of abuse, poverty and no father, and a 120-year old tenement house with cockroaches ad rats, molested, etc......I am 63 today and back in school after a 31 year abusive marriage, written a poetry book and my memoir, moderator of an abused survivors; group, my paper on abuse is in review, etc., etc......meaning........decide what you want for YOUR life, and then go for it; if you aren't sure, get a good therapist and work on it. Good luck!

Don't quit when the tide is lowest,
For it's just about to turn;
Don't quit over doubts and questions,
For there's something you may learn
Don't quit when the night is darkest
For it's just a while 'til dawn;
Don't quit when you've run the farthest
For the race is almost won.
Don't quit when the hill is steepest,
For your goal is amost nigh;
Don't quit, for you're not a failure
Unilt you fail to try.
-Jill Wolf