[dexter]

I haven't been around for awhile.

Once I started working again I felt overwhelmed just keeping up with work... but in general I was doing very well.

Things have gone downhill though. I haven't been able to keep up with my bills. Monday they repossesed my car which was a very stressful event. I couldn't go to work today and was in bed most of the day. It is lucky I stayed home because they tried to shut off my electricity again today but I was able to give them a check. Still it was another stressful event.

I was in bad shape at work of course this week and today just couldn't make it in. I stayed in bed for hours and finally forced myself to get up and take a shower which I knew would make me feel better... but it didn't. I felt like I was swimming in stress in the shower and just wanted to go right back to bed.

Instead of going back to bed I decided to try to reconnect here a little bit. One point for me.

I can't call anyone because my phone is shut off too.

I can't see how to get past this hurdle. It feels very surreal.

Right now I think I am mostly hungry so I am going to try to eat something.

(((((((((((DEXTER))))))))))))))

[Fuzzybear]

We are here for you!
(((((((((((Dex)))))))))))))))))))))))))))

[h0kie]

I know at LOT of people are going to be very happy to see you. I just wish it was on better terms.

I totally understand about not being able to keep up with bills. Is there any way to get on budget type plans? For your electricity and such?

And welcome back.

Dexter, I am so glad to see you. I'm sorry that things are in the ditch right now for you and will keep you in my thoughts and prayers. Are you taking meds? Seeing anyone to talk to? Let us know how it's going. Don't quit posting. xoxox pat

[(JD)]

<font color="blue">(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((D E X T E R !!!!!!!!!!!)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) Aw.. I'm so sorry this is happening to you..... garbage!!!! I actually felt good that someone had broken away and was free....... but maybe you were, for a while??? WELCOME BACK ole PAL!!!!

You got up and took a shower ? mmmmmmm (sniff sniff) You smell good!!!!!!!

I'm battling high pain and low depression right now... seeing you made me feel better.. so glad you remembered us here! You take all the space you need to post...

[dexter]

i feel really bad. When I left to go eat I went back to bed instead. I did finally get up and eat a sandwich and had some lemonade. Then back to bed again for another hour.

I feel like I'm under a heavy weight. I'm still planning to go to work tomorrow.

[dottie]

Sorry you are having such an awful time. It really does bite. Eat, sleep...and come back to the forum again. I am keeping us up to date on Horriblecane Rita.

~Dottie

[nothemama8]

Dexter, I was just coming to PC when you left , glad to see ya back, with the friends you have here you'll start feeling better soon
Angie

[jmo531]

((((((((((((((((((((((Dexter)))))))))))))))))))))

I am sorry to hear about your recent problems. Please know that you have a whole lot of people here to support you through this difficult time.

1day touched on something that I wanted to revisit. They have budget plans through the electric companies that you may want to check into. Also, at least SBC and Verizon offer budget plans as well for phone service. Please try and check that out. In the meantime, maybe contacting your local social services for additional help might be a good idea.
Dont be so hard on yourself about taking off today and spending it in bed. After the week you have had, I totally understand.

Please keep posting and let us know how you are doing.

[dexter]

I think I'm staying home from work again tomorrow. I'm up now with very bad joint pain. I was able to eat a second time yesterday, something a little more substantial than earlier.

I went to bed early with my Lunesta which does help me sleep, and slept well throughout the night until now. I was planning on going to work. I think my biggest problem was the idea of going to work on my scooter again without my car, and trying to get home on it. It is a nice ride, not very long, but in the shape I'm in I'm really not up for it.

If I don't feel better I may consider having a friend take me to the doctor or hospital tomorrow. I'll wait and see how tomorrow goes. I'm taking some tylenol now and trying to go back to bed.

[dexter]

I've had a hard time throughout this whole thing (for the past three years) making any contact for myself with regard to bills. I could have prevented the car being repossessed by calling them earlier. I'm back in the spot where I can't even open any of my mail, it just piles up. And this keeps happening, and I feel all of the "20/20 hindsight" regret and all of that stress, but it doesn't motivate me to do anything the next time.

I really like the idea of having a social worker help me out with this, I've been thinking about this for some time... but once again have trouble acting on it.

so sorry to hear that you are having such a rough time.....i'll keep you inmy thoughts

[wisewoman]

Dex, I am not a Nike ad. You are a tremendous man and I am sorry that you are going through this. But you do need to "just do it" If it helps, though we are far apart, I have a perfect person to help you okay? It's important to try so it doesn't get so much worse.

[dexter]

I paid my phone bill yesterday and hope they will turn my phone on again soon.

I am going to try to make some calls when they do.

I was out of bed most of the day yesterday but couldn't do anything constructive... today I slept through most of the day again.

[wisewoman]

Dex, please p.m. me, I can help. Really.

[Rapunzel]

Hey Dex!!! I have thought about you a lot. I wondered if you had fun when the new Star Wars movie opened up. I didn't get to see it (still haven't) because I had to work, and wasn't getting hardly any time off ever at the time, but my kids got their pictures taken with Darth Vader (they went to a special showing sponsored by a local Star Wars costuming goup). I definitely thought of you then.

I'm sorry that you are depessed again. Please take care of yourself. I hope that you followup with WiseWoman about getting some help with managing your bills and stuff. It sounds like you are having legitimate trouble with keeping up with certain things. If you had some help making sure that what needed to be done was done, I know that would help you to have more peace and less stress.

Do you like the new job? Wanna tell us about it?

((((((((hugs)))))))))
Rap

[LadyDragus]

my darling dexter.. Pm me and I will give you my numbers and a way to call me so you can if you need to.. Collect ok..

you have been ther for me in the past and it is time I return the favor to you..

I am so sorry it is going bad for you..
I am so sorry you lost your car, you were starting to do so well..

I love you and miss you so much..

Keep in touch when and if you can ok..
Stay safe and eat when you want, ok..
I love you with all my heart and I could never forget you my dear dexter, you are so special to me.. You made me one of the best things anyone could too.. My dragon I will never lose again..

[dexter]

Rapunzel

I was able to make it through the Star Wars opening... it was a very difficult thing to do and personally I was less than 100% successful...

But with regard to our charity group I was at least able to help out with that and we did greatly surpass all of our expectations... we ended up collecting a total of $46,600 for our charity, the Starlight-Starbright Children's Foundation, during the three weeks of our line-up, so that in itself felt very good and I really feel as if I contributed to that. We also had a great Starlight day while on the line where we had contests and face-painting and other activities that were open to all kids but also had a lot of Starlight kids there, it was an amazing day there.

There is some video of that, if you want I can look up the link...

[dexter]

Thank you so much LD... currently my phone is shut off as well, and in anycase I am not a very good "phone person"... the phone frightens me. Weird, eh?

But I do appreciate everyone's support here... that's why I'm back and posting again.

[dexter]

A friend did come over today and was able to take me out for some groceries and take me to the unveiling ceremony for my aunt which was today... I had relatives from out-of-town in for it and thought I should show up since I missed the funeral.

The grave is right next to my mom for which we never did have a funeral or an unveiling, largely because of my dad... (who luckily wasn't there today)

No one has seen me in a long time (my uncle didn't recognize me, when I walked up he thought I was the rabbi ) and I talked to them a little but couldn't really discuss what has been going on... not really an appropriate time.

I did splurge on some premade turkey chili con carne with beans in the gormet section of the grocery store my friends took me too, I figured it would last me a few days... had some before and it was yummy.

[dexter]

But I haven't heard a single peep out of anyone else I contacted to let them know what was going on... those who insisted I keep in touch and that they always want to help and are "always thinking about me".

What a bunch of BSers. I thought maybe some of them were busy during the week but still not even an acknowledgement that they heard from me.

Maybe they are afraid I am going to ask them for something like a short visit or a ride to the store... you know, something huge that would be just a huge inconvenience for them.