[Kaitlyn]

I was doing so good depression wise but now I'm having a hard time with really bad melt downs (sobbing that won't stop, being in tons of emotional pain) that go on and off for 1 to 2 days. I've tried everything I can think of for a healthy release (distracting myself by playing games, chatting with a friend (who doesn't really understand what it's like to have melt downs) and just sleeping it off. The one person I normally turn to when I'm having these kind of melt downs is my hermana (spanish for sister), but she hasn't been as available as she usually is for the past week and she'll be away for another week and she won't have access to the internet during that time and I won't be able to reach her whatsoever....I won't even be able to reach her on her cell phone.

I just don't know what to do right now.

Kaitlyn

[SlatkaMala]

I'm sorry you're having a rough time. What triggered the melt down? Meltdowns are a royal pain.

[Kaitlyn]

I don't know what triggered this one. I've been having melt down problems on and off since Christmas Eve. I thought I was fine after chatting with my hermana on facebook Christmas night. We got a really bad snow storm and the winds were really strong and I get easily scared when the winds are howling and we had two power surges last night that scared be because they happened during the strong howling winds. I'm so used to chatting with her practically every day and this isn't something I'm used to. I was hoping I wouldn't have any more melt downs because she won't be reachable from the 31st till at least Jan. 6th. And she's the only person in my life who is openly loving and understands what I'm going through, and understands what it's like to having melt downs and flashbacks.

[Kaitlyn]

I saw my doctor this morning and the cause of this is an "explosion".....what happened is that I had bottled up too much for too long. I'm still barely able to function and I'm pretty much shutting down emotionally and psychologically. I'm not eating or drinking more than once a day, and even then it's not that much. The worst part is that there's nothing anyone can to right now. There's no medication that will help me feel better and talking to some support people in real life isn't helping, and talking to those people usually does help me. I did talk to my hermana this morning and that only helped me feel a little bit better. Usually it would cheer me up completely. The only suggestion my doctor had was for me to take things one minute at a time. Which pretty much sucks.

[Gilead]

I'm sorry Kaitlyn. I wish there were some words of wisdom to calm you. I understand "melt downs" and have them myself.

Try to ride it out until you can see/speak to your sister again. You're in my thoughts.

[Kaitlyn]

I talked to my sister this morning about it this morning and it didn't really help all that much because it was kind of a rushed conversation. I'm hoping I can have one of my normal long chats with her once she gets back from her camping trip next week.