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  #1  
Old Nov 13, 2005, 07:51 PM
quality_worms quality_worms is offline
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Today I called my parents on the phone. I meant to tell them that I was starting to see a counselor at school for depression, but every time the opportunity came up, I didn't say anything. I have mixed feelings about talking about depression, because on one hand it's not really anyone else's business, but on the other hand I'd kind of like people to know that I'm not just isolating myself because I hate them. I wish I could just know that people would understand.

My parents might not exactly understand, but they wouldn't look down on me (I think) for being depressed or for getting help. But I keep lying about how I'm doing. I feel dishonest. And another thing is that if I go on medication, I'll have to tell them, because I'm on their insurance. I'd rather not have that be the first time they hear what's going on.

I'm just really frustrated with myself. telling people

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  #2  
Old Nov 13, 2005, 09:43 PM
quality_worms quality_worms is offline
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nevermind, i'm just making mountain ranges out of molehills today and i can't delete this post anymore.... telling people
  #3  
Old Nov 13, 2005, 10:44 PM
Lauren05 Lauren05 is offline
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Hi there,QW--
Sorry to hear that you are feeling so frustrated today. It is hard to let people know what is going on. I think that you should tell your parents and let them know what your situation is. It may seem scary at first, but it will get easier with time and patience.Talking about your situation will help you to express your feelings better, and will help your parents to understand what you are going through.I went through the same thing and it was very awkward and uncomfortable at first, but the more I opened up to my parents about seeing a counselor at college, the easier it became to open up to them. Lots of hugs and cheers.
Sincerely, Lauren
P.S. Feel free to post or email me at any time you need to do so.
  #4  
Old Nov 13, 2005, 10:56 PM
JustBen JustBen is offline
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I know how you're feeling. It can be hard to talk about that kind of thing. Could you send them a letter or email? It can sometimes help when you can get your thoughts down properly without worrying about a live person on the other end of the line.
  #5  
Old Nov 13, 2005, 11:01 PM
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Fuzzybear Fuzzybear is offline
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I don't see any mountain ranges here.... telling people telling people ((((((((((((((((((((((QW)))))))))))))))))))))

PM me if you want to growl telling people
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  #6  
Old Nov 14, 2005, 01:23 AM
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jmo531 jmo531 is offline
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Member Since: Dec 2004
Posts: 3,600
QW,

Hi!!!

I am sorry your going through this difficult time right now. Having to tell anyone what you are going through is difficult enough, but telling parents seems the most difficult.

I can totally understand your reluctance on this matter. I agree with what Ben said above. Writing a letter to your parents might be easier for you rather then talking to them face to face right now. I know for me, I find it easier to express myself on paper. This will also give you a chance to reassure them that you are seeking therapy to get better. In writing this letter, you may want to anticipate any questions they may have so that you can answer those questions in the letter to further put their minds at ease. Your parents care for you and will likely want to assist you in any way that they can. It is hard to be so upfront when we are afraid to disapoint the ones we love.

I wish you luck with this.



Hugs,

Jen
  #7  
Old Nov 14, 2005, 02:59 AM
quality_worms quality_worms is offline
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Member Since: Oct 2005
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telling people

Thanks, everyone...
I could write them a letter, but I feel like that's somehow cheating. Like, I should be able to say what I need to say. Does that make sense? And I guess the part that I'm the most worried about is the fact that I've never told them when I felt depressed. Now I have to suddenly say, "So, by the way, this has been going on for months and months..." and I'm sure they don't realize how much trouble I have talking about things.

I don't want to think about this, but I keep going around in circles. I wish. my brain. would shut up already.
  #8  
Old Nov 14, 2005, 03:16 AM
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I understand very well. I never tell my parents when I am going through a depression; for me and for my relationship with them and their reactions, it is easier to just not say anything.

C
  #9  
Old Nov 14, 2005, 03:22 AM
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Fuzzybear Fuzzybear is offline
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well I think there's a bit of an age difference there telling people

I finally learnt somewhere between cub and fuzzy not to keep everything from the parentals.... for my (comparative) sanity.... although they were never understanding or caring telling people

Shut up bear..... back to your cave telling people
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  #10  
Old Nov 14, 2005, 01:48 PM
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dexter dexter is offline
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Location: New Jersey
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If you are trying to tell them verbally but get caught every time you try, don't think of the letter as "cheating" but rather as "getting the ball rolling".

You could tell them everything in the letter, or you could just give them the details and use that as a stepping point to filling them in more later, verbally. Maybe in the letter explain how this is hard to talk about, and the depression makes it hard to talk about.

Good luck worms. I think this is a good thing for you to be doing.
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  #11  
Old Nov 14, 2005, 02:23 PM
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silver_queen silver_queen is offline
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I so understand what you've been going through... I've never told my family about my depression, even when I needed to, until it was taken out of my hands and they were informed anyway. I too considered writing a letter but never got round to doing so... but if you think about it, writing everything in a letter gives you a great chance to say what you want, without interruption, where you can write exactly what you want in a logical fashion... and then you have the chance to go back and clarify anything... without having to face the reaction of your parents when you tell them. Instead, they can read the letter, calm down about it and discuss it. You could also write down just why you've been so reluctant to tell them. It's definitely not cheating... in fact I think it will be a lot easier foryou to write it down and tell them than to tell them to their faces. I know how it feels when you wonder just why you can't just tell them, but admitting this kind of thing is definitely hard... good luck telling people
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