[Yack]

Does anyone have anything I can throw? Lol

Seriously, I am so confused. I posted earlier - the T thinks I have separation anxiety issues.

Ok.

I think that a whole lot of stuff happened to me in 2 years that was a CRISIS.

Doc John or Ben, if you are out there...

You know the Holmes and Rahe index of stress - I was over 500 points in 3 months during the court thing. in other words, I should I have dropped on the spot. But I didn't. Because I am no a wimp.

No. I dropped the DAY OF THE COURT THING. I unraveling like a 5 year old. I had some sort of delayed stress reaction. Ok.

But One year later and I am still STUCK. I don't get it.

I can tell you, where I live makes me unhappy. I keep wanted to go back home and I know I can't.

Before court, no such worries.

Before V, no worries. No worries about anything. I was moving into an apartment with a friend before that slime ball came along.

Everything unraveled over a series of 9 months. Very very very high stress. I mean things we cannot control-this was legal stuff that scared me to death, not to mention him. I was afraid of him.

So what am I supposed to do now??

I am just sort of "waking up" so to speak and immediately want to do SOMETHING. But that means moving, or working...I just have no idea. I got so off track with what happened and it was not my fault. I get that. But I am sick of being a lump.

[Zorah]

Yeah, we got an idea (((((Yack))))))

You buy a cheap punching bag & gloves then you pin a photo of the person you want to belt to the top.

If the photo is of you it's still safe

The first time we had to go to court Seven went we got that stress index thing so high for the last 12 years we definitely should be dead

It takes a couple of years, at least, to recover from this stuff, but you are right, you're a survivor

[JustBen]

I am out here, Yack, and I know what a 500+ on the Holmes/Rhea means. It means that you're an extremely tough person, and that you ought to be patting yourself on the back simply for continuing to function. You seem really frustrated that you can't get your life back to the way it was before all this happened. If that's your goal, you're just going to frustrate yourself. You can get to "normal" again, but it's not going to look the same as it did before everything went down. It's like shaking up a kaleidascope...things can be beautiful again, but they're going to settle into a different pattern than they were before.

If you're feeling like it's time to move forward, then maybe you should make that your focus in therapy. Tell your therapist that you'd like to focus on forming a plan to get a job and move.

[hillbunnyb]

Love the kaleidascope image Ben, thanks.
Hang tough Yackster, it'll move, law of nature. (If you throw ice cubes against a brick wall there's no cleanup to have to deal with......)

[Lexicon78]

Hang in there, tough girl! You can make it through this!