Utterly hopeless

I'm tired... I've become this zombie, slow motion, somehow separated from myself. If I do something.. talk.. it doesn't feel as it was my lips moving... the voice is coming from some place else. Muffled or something.

Amazing how a person can get attached.. customed.. to the strangest things. Then again, you think it's normal to do that.. "care".. but you only think it is. You don't feel it. That's how you're an outsider.

I don't want to see yet another tomorrow

Be safe Neri I too have moved in and out of feeling no feelings and then too many feelings too.....just stay safe please

(((((((((((((((((Neri))))))))))))))))

Hang in there hun. We are here for you. I am so sorry your feeling like this.


Huggles,


Jen

Neri,

What's got you so down?

Jane

i don't know... christmas maybe.. bills.. pets.. not feeling like i'm in control..

feeling like i'm an idiot, like this voice shouting at me all the time "look what you did now you moron!"

oh.. the voice was right.

Don't listen to the voice.

Maybe you are very tired. Maybe you need to really take care of your body and get some rest.

Please stay safe! (((((((((Neri))))))))))

neri, don't feel alone. we're here for you. i understand how the holidays can affect us...but we just have to lean into it and go on. keep posting....love, pat

No Neri,

The voice is WRONG!!!

Keep yourself safe. Christmas just kinds of distorts everything for a lot of us.

Hugs, Jane

No Neri...the voice is not right at all. Turn away from it. You are a very super person. I have read your posts and enjoyed them very much. You are an intelligent, kind person. Please don't believe any negative voices or thoughts as they lie to you. Trust me, please!! Take care of yourself. Try to get plenty of rest and make sure that you are eating enough.

It's true...the Holidays can be extremely stressful. Take some moments just for you. That's what I did today. I said bye to my parrot and took off for the afternoon. I went to a wonderful shop where they have such delightful things to check out. That brought up my mood. I am glad I forced myself to do it. Take good care of yourself. Hey...we wouldn't like it if you weren't around to post. We love you here...and want you to feel happy, kiddo.You can PM me anytime! XXOO Dottie

What do you think you did....where do you lack control...how can we help? I do know the voices are wrong ..and agree with all you need to take care of you and yeah the holidays suck a lot

hugs and um youre not an idiot or whatever you called yourself

Neri,

Lately, things have been extremely difficult for me as well. The voices urging us to give up and wanting to give in. You can not listen to the voices. As the others said above, it is wrong.
Keep talking Neri. We are here to listen.

Huggles,

jen

((((((((((((((((( Neri ))))))))))))))))))

The voices are wrong. You are a good and lovely person. The holidays are so hard on a lot of us. Please take good care of this and know that "This too shall pass." Take good care of yourself right now.

Hugs,

Jan

I'm really sorry you are having so much trouble. Please try to hang in there and stay safe. I know what you're talking about. I've been there.

We're all here for you!

Neri,

Just thinking about you. How are you feeling today?

Huggles,

jen

i'm having trouble sleeping. not like i couldn't get sleep, it's just that i don't want to. I'd rather always be awake, or always be asleep, not in the middle...

I pretty much wish I could sleep ALL the time.....I do not know but can you see a T or your T...this sounds so painful for you maybe some IRL help could be of use

{{{{{neri}}}}}

I'm in a wanting to sleep all the time mode now and feeling extremely lethargic. (Even cancelled my pdoc appointment for today - not good!)

I agree with what all the other posters have said...please, stay safe. Do you have anyone who is supportive you feel comfortable talking to?

I'm really needing a relief

I have no-one to support me or talk with IRL and people treat me like I was air anyway, I don't think I can stay clean anymore, drugs are the only thing I know to get me trough this alive

drugs make us like we are dead though, at least the abused ones. Perscribed meds can be great. I hope you get some rest and feel better.

they've never made me feel dead

HAVE YOU called your T...You will kick yourself in the A.M if you do them....I guess all I can say is PLEASE CALL YOUR T AND TELL HIM/HER ABOUT THIS

hey neri.... I know I don't know nearly enough about all of this but I just wanted to say that I'm thinking of you and hope things get better for you....soon. hun, drugs make things be "okay" in the short term b/c you can escape thinking about things, even feeling... but the reality is, the next day those problems are still there, lurking behind the corner... trust me, I understand, I've been there and am still struggling, but if there is one thing I can say it never ever fixed anything in the long run, if anything it caused more problems if I think about it. a T would really be the best person to talk to about this, b/f you make any decision... at least give it a try, it's worth a shot.

at this point even a short break from this feeling would be enough... i know what goes up must come down, but i've always felt that the coming down part of it feels fake, and thus less bad than the actual feeling. meh.. i'm not trying to justify myself (okay i clearly am) but i'm saying that at the moment... i really don't care about the consequences