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#1
Feb 10, 2006, 10:34 PM
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I'm so damn depressed I can't even put into words how depressed I am. I'd email my T, but I don't know how to describe it to him. "Depressed" only scratches the tip of the iceberg.
I haven't gotten out of bed all day. I'm not at all hungry, so I haven't eaten. I'm smack dab in the middle of learning how to accept a recently diagnosed chronic illness which, oh by the way, can still kill me. I'm out of a job where I hadn't worked for a year, so wasn't eligible for short-term disability. I don't know where my money is coming from, month to month. My family paid for December and January while I was in the hospital, and my friends took care of February, but I can't keep hitting people up for cash (and my family has already told me they can't afford any more). Yet I'm incapable of working, because the illness drains my energy. One of my sisters lives in Rochester, MN where the Mayo Clinic is, and wants me to move in with her and get my care there until I'm well enough to come back to Milwaukee. I don't WANT to move to Minnesota. My support network is HERE. I've lived on my own for half my life and I can't stand the thought of having to be dependent on other people for stuff. Nobody was here to help me when I couldn't even walk, why should I rely on anyone now? The drs. took me off a bunch of my psych meds because they thought some of them might be causing the illness. I'm back on a few, but at half the doses I was, and I think I'm paying for it. Yet nobody wants me to go up on them again in case it makes the physical illness worse. I don't know what to do. I just want to go to bed and never get out again. Does anybody have a magic wand to make it all go away? Candy |
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#2
Feb 10, 2006, 10:55 PM
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{{{{Candybear}}}}
 Sometimes I feel so frustrated when I read posts because I want to help someway, but generally am not due to distance, etc. You continue in my thoughts and prayers. I truly wish I had a magic wand, Candy. Since you really don't want to move to MN, if you havene't already, perhaps checking out the social services in your area might be a next step. (Did you have a social worker assigned from your hospital stay?) Often they can put you in touch for necessary resources. I'm always ready to listen here in PM or chat. Considering all you've been through, the depression is not unusual but stinks going through it! 
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#3
Feb 10, 2006, 11:02 PM
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I got turned down for Medicaid because they don't consider me disabled. I applied for SSDI, but they'll give me the same answer. I can probably get SSI, but they won't make the determination for months yet. I haven't heard about the state insurance or food stamps yet. But as far as income-producing aid programs go, I'm out of luck.
 . I can't even get rent assistance -- there's a freeze on the program and they aren't even taking applications for THREE YEARS.Ah, the hell with it -- I'm going back to bed. Candy |
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#4
Feb 10, 2006, 11:29 PM
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(((((((((((Candybear))))))))))))))
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#5
Feb 11, 2006, 01:04 AM
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(((((((CANDY))))))))
__________________
It is said an Eastern monarch once charged his wise men to invent him a sentence, to be ever in view, and which should be true and appropriate in all times and situations. They presented him the words: "And this, too, shall pass away." How much it expresses! How chastening in the hour of pride! How consoling in the depths of affliction! ---"Address before the Wisconsin State Agricultural Society". Abraham Lincoln Online. Milwaukee, Wisconsin. September 30, 1859. |
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#6
Feb 11, 2006, 01:13 AM
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(((((((((((((Candy)))))))))))) I wish I had a magic wand.
__________________
 His & Hers Depression Blog http://his-hers.ozzieblackcat.com/ Avon Website http://youravon.com/susanking |
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#7
Feb 11, 2006, 01:18 AM
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oh (((((((((((((candy))))))))))))))) i'm so sorry.
don't give up! there are many programs out there. have you contacted the red cross or united way in your area? SSI can come through still yet with the new dx you have on top of the old. i'm so sorry, honey, for this hell on earth you've been going through. PM me with county and state information, and i'll get on the phone if you don't feel like it, ok? i'm GOOD on the phone.  we're here. we care so much. kd
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#8
Feb 11, 2006, 02:50 AM
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Candybear,
If you go apply for for Wisconsin FoodShare, you will almost certainly be approved for max benefits immediately, and receive your FoodShare card within seven days. I went through this here in Missouri, and it was a breeze. I have just finished reading info on Wisconsin's program, and it sounds virually identical. The fact that you have no income will get things rolling quickly, I'm sure. I know things are completely miserable for you, I can't even imagine...but I think you can get the food program happening pretty quickly. You've got a lot of people on your side. DJ
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Peace, DJ "Maturity is nothing more than a firmer grasp of cause and effect." -Bob "and the angels, and the devils, are playin' tug-o-war with my personality" -Snakedance, The Rainmakers |
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#9
Feb 11, 2006, 03:36 AM
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(((((Candy)))))
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#10
Feb 11, 2006, 11:45 AM
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(((((((((((candy))))))))))))))
__________________
 No kind action ever stops with itself. One kind action leads to another. Good example is followed. A single act of kindness throws out roots in all directions, and the roots spring up and make new trees. The greatest work that kindness does to others is that it makes them kind themselves.
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#11
Feb 11, 2006, 11:51 AM
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(((((((Candy))))))
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#12
Feb 11, 2006, 06:24 PM
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(((((((((((Candybear))))))))))
Unfortunately, no magic wand here.
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If you're not living on the edge, you're taking up too much space! Rondeau |
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#13
Feb 11, 2006, 08:10 PM
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((((((((((Candybear))))))))))))))
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#14
Feb 11, 2006, 08:31 PM
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Hi Candy. I can feel where you are coming from. My advice would be to:Bite the Bullet...and accept your sister's offer.
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 dottie |
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#15
Feb 12, 2006, 03:23 AM
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i do hope that you're feeling better. xoxoxo pat
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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