[CastlesInTheAir]

I have noticed my two biggest problems are worrying and over analyzing to the point that i make myself paranoid.

For instance I am on a final warning for quality at work. I made over the allowed amount of errors for this period. I have been at this job for 4 and a half years. I have no clue how to work anywhere else. I have also never been fired from a job. I have been in panic mode for the past two weeks on this. I almost turned in my two weeks notice as i do not want being terminated on my job application. However after talking to more rationale people they suggest that quitting is not the answer. I don't know 100 % if they will actually fire me or not they have worked with people in the past and everyone there loves me as a Co worker and does not want to see me leave. So why am I worrying about something that has not happend yet? Instead I should focus on the now and focus on the work instead of worrying myself to death which hinders my focus.

I hung out with some friends this weekend and spent the night with one of my guy friends. We ended up snuggling all night and let our hands travel. The next day instead of thinking about how relaxing it was to cuddle with someone and how good of a time I had with friends I start looking for negatives and hidden agendas. Even if the negatives turn out to be true its their problem and not mine. Why should I assume the worst in people? Why not hang somewhere in the middle and let the energies flow where they may?

I try hard to read minds when i can't and i always assume they are thinking negatively. I need to stop doing this.

I look at absolutely everything from every possible angle I can think of.

[dailyhealing]

Hello! Thanks for sharing this, and it sounds like a couple of issues here but related to the same thing? It sounds to me like some anxiety as well as some distorted thoughts perhaps? I can relate to the tendency to always assume the worst in terms of what others think of me. It is a hard one for sure. I also get that overanalyzing thing! One thing I have done to get some success is through therapy doing some talking about my perceptions vs. reality. Not sure you are in therapy, but maybe there is somewhere you could talk about this. Thanks for sharing this, you are certainly not alone in these struggles. If you ever want to talk I'm always happy to listen.

[shezbut]

Hi triciadrich

I agree with dailyhealing. Your description strikes me as high anxiety as well as distorted thoughts.

I can certainly empathize. I have been there with both issues too. I have a bad habit of over-analyzing and then sticking with worst-case scenarios to form false beliefs. A real tough habit to break! However, recognizing that you have this tendency is a nice, big first step. The next step is to correct yourself when you do start to over-analyze and get your mind involved in something else, to prevent it from going down the dark path.

Best wishes to you ~ take care!

[dailyhealing]

Your comments Shezbut made me think of something else my therapist would talk to me about when we talked about these issues. He talked about how there was this cycle of thought to feeling to action. The trick, he said, is to stop yourself at the thinking. That sounds like what Shezbut was saying, but maybe different words? He always told me that by the time I got from thought to feeling it was too late, and that catching it at the thought and correcting the false thought was the key to breaking the cycle.

Wishing you well. And thanks again for sharing this, you are not alone in these struggles.

[roads]

Originally Posted by triciadrich

I have noticed my two biggest problems are worrying and over analyzing to the point that i make myself paranoid.

....

I try hard to read minds when i can't and i always assume they are thinking negatively. I need to stop doing this.

I look at absolutely everything from every possible angle I can think of.

Tricia, I can't help noticing the radical change of focus here. In presenting your dual problems of worrying and over analyzing, you cite as an example the final warning you've been given at work. You don't want to be fired & have even considered resigning.

But in following through your initial thought that you worry & over analyze to the point of making yourself paranoid, you switch from your employment crisis to how good times you have with friends end with your looking for negatives and hidden agendas.

Could it be that some of the work problems are arising from personal relationships and professional issues being juxtaposed? Being friends with co-workers isn't the same thing as being friendly. There's a few grains of truth for many of us in that old adage about not going into business with a friend ... it really can complicate the day-to-day flow of the office.

Obviously I'm just guessing, but the jump from the job warning issue to the friend's agenda question just seems a big gap to me. IDK. But maybe think about it?

Roadie

[CastlesInTheAir]

A lot of my current life revolves around my job. I came to this job at the end of a very toxic relationship where friendships became distant or nonexistent. A lot of my Co workers became my friends and a couple of them are my closest friends. We also work longgggg hours so i imagine it would only be natural for people to become close. Since I have been there for awhile quite a few no longer work there so now I do have "outside" friends. I admit it does mess with the flow of the warehouse when things are good the flow is great when you add betrayals and heartless rumors in the mix stuff happens.

I know a lot of my issues stem from that toxic relationship. So when someone betrays me even on the smallest thing or sends a certain vibe my way i take it very personally.

It does not help when the world is full of shady characters and drug addictions.