[southernbell90]

I normally don't like venting to random people but its gotten so bad at this point and i have no one else I can talk to or trust and if I keep this in anymore I might explode!!! I'm sure most people have some sort of problem with their mother or father or whatever, but this is getting out of control. Since I was 8, and I'm now 19, my mother has made me the second mom in our house. My parents are split and she had to work. And since then its only gotten worse. Everything I do is wrong and selfish and I'm a piece of s**t one minute then she tries to be my best friend the next. She is constantly screaming about everything and anything and her favorite trick is to make you feel like a guilty piece of s**t!!! I know this doesn't sound like much but i couldn't even begin to do her harm justice. And because its all emotional and mental and not physical abuse the general thought is "suck it up it can't be that bad". I hate that people belittle this. it makes me feel even more on the outside. I've been seeing a dr. for anxiety, depression, and add since my mother caused me to have a huge mental breakdown at school. and now that I had to come closer to home because of money and am at this second at my mothers house for her birthday its all getting worse. I can't get better here and she won't let me get help because she thinks I'm full of ****. I know she has her own problems but I can't take this life anymore. I can't get away, I can't escape, I can't get help. I just don't know what else to do. I need just someone who believes me and understands and can help. but it keeps seeming like that is just to much to ask for. :/

[Leed]

Good grief. She's all sweet and nice one minute and the next she's chasing you around with a cleaver, right? Yes, I'd say she has issues. And I can fully understand why YOU have issues too!

Depression is awful to live with. I truly think I was born with is, as I remember feeling very sad and depressed as a vry small child. Both my parents were alcoholics so that was the cause of my depression. There were lots of fights, and arguments and it was very hard to sleep thru THEM.

I'm glad you're seeing your doctor for anxiety & depression, but hasn't he suggested sending you on to a therapist? If he hasn't, he should! You should be seen by a licensed psychologist or psychiatrist -- personally, I prefer the former. They give more input and suggestions than the latter.

[Rohag]

Originally Posted by southernbell90

I can't get better here...

I agree. Pain relievers are of limited help while the piranha are still biting you. Putting at least psychological distance between you and your tormentor is needed.

Welcome, Southernbell90!

((( southernbell90 )))

If you have access to the internet, look up the terms gaslighting and brainwashing ... Then if anyone tries to minimize how damaging emotional abuse is, you can tell them to blow it out their you know what ...

I endured emotional, verbal, physical and sexual abuse by my mother for 3 decades ... Of all the abuses I suffered, the emotional and verbal have been the most difficult to heal from ...

I hope you can escape sooner than later ... The longer you're in it the more damaging it's going to be ...

I can assure you of one thing though ... You are not any of those things she's telling you ... She's those things, and worse ... She is projecting it onto you because of her own pathetic and miserable failures in life ...

Sorry you're having to suffer through this ...



,
Pfrog!