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Old Jun 10, 2006, 06:17 PM
Lexicon78 Lexicon78 is offline
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Location: Pennsylvania
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Well, since last night I decided I really am falling apart right now, even if nobody else can see it.

I mean the anxiety, panic attacks, nightmares, severe depression, cutting, flashbacks, and unfortunately, yes, suicidality all points to something bad.

I'm going to partial on Tuesday and my resource coordinator (like an ICM) is coming Monday...so I'll get to talk to someone about this stuff. I just hope I can hold on that long. I still have to get through the weekend.

Last night I had horrible nightmares. I woke up and started to cry. I'll write about it in the Survivors of Abuse forum when I get there. But I just am really trying so hard just to stay...here.
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  #2  
Old Jun 10, 2006, 06:30 PM
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Fuzzybear Fuzzybear is offline
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Please stay safe (((((( Lex ))))))

(I'll try too Falling Apart...)
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  #3  
Old Jun 10, 2006, 07:17 PM
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(JD) (JD) is offline
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Memories of traumas always disturb "real life" while trying to work through them. It's nearly Sunday now... try to distract yourself from thinking, and allow the therapy time to find the answers. TC
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  #4  
Old Jun 10, 2006, 08:05 PM
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Oh, Rachel! You can do this, hon! Keep fighting!!!!

(((((((((((( Rachel )))))))))))))

Falling Apart Falling Apart
  #5  
Old Jun 10, 2006, 08:28 PM
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DaveyJones DaveyJones is offline
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Member Since: Sep 2005
Location: Big Orange Country
Posts: 912
Just keep posting...that will help keep you busy until your appointment!

Be safe...we're with you!

DJ
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"Maturity is nothing more than a firmer grasp of cause and effect."
-Bob

"and the angels, and the devils,
are playin' tug-o-war with my personality"
-Snakedance, The Rainmakers
  #6  
Old Jun 10, 2006, 11:09 PM
Lexicon78 Lexicon78 is offline
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Member Since: Mar 2004
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Thank you everyone for your support. It means so much to me.

I am doing better now. I mean last night and this morning I was a mess but have seemed to weather the storm and am feeling better.
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"When they discover the center of the universe, a lot of people will be disappointed to discover they are not it." -Bernard Bailey
  #7  
Old Jun 11, 2006, 04:06 AM
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Sabrina Sabrina is offline
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That is good to hear. Please try to hang in there. Sending you lots of safe vibes!
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Crying isn't a sign of weakness. It's a sign of having tried too hard to be strong for too long.
  #8  
Old Jun 11, 2006, 09:43 AM
wisewoman wisewoman is offline
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Member Since: May 2004
Posts: 4,415
Hi Lexi, hang in there, you can do it. How bout some duct tape to hold you together? I am sorry you are in so much pain. Can you be with safe people? Continued success.
  #9  
Old Jun 11, 2006, 03:14 PM
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ozzie ozzie is offline
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(((((((((Lexi)))))))))) I'm glad you're feeling a little better.
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  #10  
Old Jun 11, 2006, 03:39 PM
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tita tita is offline
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Member Since: May 2006
Location: New York new york city
Posts: 193
I'm so sorry You are going thru this kind of flashbacks,if it helps I think u are a nice and wonderful person treat urself with care and I think u are specail and hate what this is doing to u.You have given me some very helpful feedback in the past and it helped me I care about you if you want to talk to me u can private message me,hang in there (((((((lex))))))
Love Ya
Tita
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