[Ladyzero]

After being in bed all year, yes a whole year literally, my days are just going by in a sleepy haze.
Here we are sat. 5pm, I'm of course under the duvet, I haven't moved today, even to make a cup of tea. I'm here alone, it's pitch dark and the house is cold. Totally alone, in my misery.

What would you do ? There is no one to talk to, my family don't bother with me. I'd love to text the long lost bf, who's waited a year for me, just to feel close to him. If I do though chances are he'll want me to go to see him, I'm not up for the huge task of making myself decent. I am unshowered and of course undressed, curled up, freezing cold. Am I the only one living like this ? Yesterday I only ate some ice cream, but there's no food in the house. If I'm to eat tonight it'll have to be another pizza delivered.

I just want to go to sleep again, then tomorrow comes. Another cold, lonely, dark day, and such is my life. I need help.

sorry you feel like this... i can't really offer advice because my days are the same too (with the small exception of the fact i probably eat more)

i think the only thing i can really say is.. try figure out what it is you want from life, what would make you happy.. then do small steps to acheeve it

you mention about your long lost boyfriend... perhaps text him and see what he is doing?

if he's free, maybe you can invite him round... take a little shower, get yourself dressed and then sit with him... it does not have to be for a long time, but hey... it gets you out of bed- and talking to someone other than the people on these forums

i know how you feel- life really sucks and sometimes (more often than not) i just want to end it all and be done with this pain.

but you gotta think.... what do you want. what's keeping you alive

[Ladyzero]

Sanity Doll, thanks for the reply.
To invite the bf up isn't an option, the house is a pit, and I'd need more than a little shower to look half decent. My hair is long, it hasn't been washed, doing that, then the tedious straightning, takes ages.
I'd need a day to get ready, I really am a mess.

What keeps me alive ? Now there's a question, and I can't answer it.
I hate my life. I'm scared, I'm 52. I could live another 40 years.

From our messages, S.S. I know you find joy and satisfaction in your music, dvds and games. I don't. Since I found this place, I'm here, every day.

How do I get out of this mess? It's nearly a week til christmas, and I've done nothing, I probably won't bother either. If my son buys a turkey I'll cook it, otherwise I won't go shopping.

What a mess

Originally Posted by Ladyzero

Sanity Doll, thanks for the reply.
To invite the bf up isn't an option, the house is a pit, and I'd need more than a little shower to look half decent. My hair is long, it hasn't been washed, doing that, then the tedious straightning, takes ages.
I'd need a day to get ready, I really am a mess.

What keeps me alive ? Now there's a question, and I can't answer it.
I hate my life. I'm scared, I'm 52. I could live another 40 years.

From our messages, S.S. I know you find joy and satisfaction in your music, dvds and games. I don't. Since I found this place, I'm here, every day.

How do I get out of this mess? It's nearly a week til christmas, and I've done nothing, I probably won't bother either. If my son buys a turkey I'll cook it, otherwise I won't go shopping.

What a mess

i wish you luck. that you find something to motivate you.
you seriously can't like living like this- you said yourself.. you hate your life

keep posting here- we're listening