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#1
Feb 22, 2013, 03:20 PM
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Hi PC friends,
I haven't started a thread in a little while, I've mostly been sailing smoothly on my new meds since the new year, but I've been slipping this past week and it has been pretty terrifying. Today I've hit a relative low, just want to cry and give up the fight. Nothing much new has happened, I saw a lot of friends this week, got a fair amount of work done, and did a good amount of exercise. I've been on PC all week as well, and even spoke with two of my best friends from out of town. I did have a conflict with one of my close friends here (they're in love with me and I'm not with them and they keep pushing the boundaries we've set up), but I was able to clearly communicate my needs. I don't think that's what is triggering me, it started last week when I started to feel utterly lonely, friendless, which is of course not the case. Uggh, just want to sleep and wake up at another time, as another person. Sweet, sweet people on PC, I need some love from people who understand. RJ Last edited by RJ78; Feb 22, 2013 at 04:43 PM. |
 Anonymous33250, optimize990h, Rohag
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#2
Feb 22, 2013, 03:23 PM
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Quote:
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#3
Feb 22, 2013, 04:00 PM
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Quote:
Quote:
Sleep is good. May you get some refreshing sleep. Post as much as you want, RJ. 
__________________
My dog  mastered the "fetch" command. He would communicate he wanted something, and I would fetch it.
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 RJ78
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#4
Feb 22, 2013, 05:12 PM
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I was just thinking today about all the things I have to be grateful for...food and shelter, parents that take me to my appts and a sister coming to visit soon. Yet I feel so low. I guess even though like you I have been trying my best all week, cleaning, helping my son adjust to new routines etc. The depression won't leave me alone.
I also just want to sleep and wake up a new person. You are appreciated here RJ. Hugs and I hope you feel better again tomorrow! |
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#5
Feb 22, 2013, 05:25 PM
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Thanks Kelly and Rohag,
I just broke down crying, and it seems I still have some left in me! I just can't handle this level of pain. I have an appointment with my therapist on Monday and my physician on Thursday and I'm going to ask about increasing my dosage, since I'm on a relatively low dosage right now. I was just hoping that I could get some extended relief this time, you know, a few months where I feel like a normal human being. Where I do my job, I solidify my friendships, I show some creativity, I excel at the stuff that's important to me...oh yeah, and I don't call everyone in my support network crying uncontrollably and scaring them nearly to death. Oh depression, you steal my life. You say this is my life. I say it's melancholife. |
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#6
Feb 22, 2013, 07:06 PM
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Just stopping by RJ to say I hope things look up soon for you!
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#7
Feb 23, 2013, 12:11 AM
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Quote:
I've also had men that were crazy about me. There was no way that I felt the same way. I'm not into the gay scene. RJ, is that the case with what you said? There are lots of couples I see and they seem so much in love with the way it looks. It makes me question; are the both of them really crazy for each other, or is it just one of them? I could never put on an act to be in love with someone that I'm not in love with. But, it always seems like the case of someone is in love with me and I don't feel that way, or vice versa. |
| extremebipolar1
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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