[Nammu]

I'm stuck. Ran out of litter last week, out of wet cat food yesterday, will soon run out of dry cat food. Thats more worrying to me than the car that I need to somehow I need to get in to my mechanic to fix. I still can't lift anything over 10 lbs so that stops me from using cabs, this may be the south but drivers do not get out of their cabs to help anymore. My frig has been empty for a couple weeks but frozen food is still good, I just can't seem to deal with anything. Every night I tell myself tomorrow I'm going to get up, get dressed, go get the mail(uncollected for over a month) see if I can lift the hood of my car(it's heavy and all I may need is coolant-I hope/dream but I suspect its the fan).

I tell myself I'm going to watch TV, I turned it on and some one local got drunk and shot his friend, the gun laws were raging, I shut it off and went back to bed with another book to escape reality. I did manage to watch some TV during the last week, but when I try to face the door inertia set in and I head for the bed. Its just too overwhelming. This is the first I've had my computer on for quite a while. I wanted to see if I could find a place to order groceries, pay bills but I can't seem to remember my passwords. I feel like there's a growing pyramid weighing me down.

[Rohag]

Wow, Sidestepper. Time to call for practical help. Your illnesses interfere so much with your life that you are in danger of going hungry and worse.

United Way / AIRS Home – 211.org
State Departments of Human Services (different states use slightly different terms):

Department of Social Services (DSS)
Department of Human Services (DHS)
Department of Health and Social Services (DHSS)
Department of Social and Health Services (DSHS)
Health & Human Services Commission (HHSC)

Salvation Army, St. Vincent de Paul, Catholic Charities, Independent Charities of America...

[Sam2]

I'm sorry you are going through such a rough time. Depression and pain can be both isolating and paralyzing. If you are in a town that has cabs readily available, there should be a store that will delivery groceries to you.

Please forgive me if I am asking or telling you anything that you have brought up in past posts. It sounds as though you are agoraphobic, but chronic pain can cause isolation and unwillingness to go out as well.

Were I living by myself, I dont' think I would go outside anymore. Fortunately, I'm not, and although its a fight to get up every morning to a fresh battle, they make sure I do. Do you have anyone at all that can help you? I"m concerned that you may become dehydrated or too weak to get to help if you need it.

Sleeping is sometimes the only relief from pain. Is that what you are seeking? I'm not sure what your financial situation is, but while you are online, look up "The journey to the wild divine". I know, corny as h... Its a biofeedback game that teaches you to control your breathing, heartrate and blood pressure. Its a steep learning curve, but once you learn, it is well worth it. You can find sets on ebay as well.

I suffer from chronic daily migraines from which no medications really help anymore. For a long time, I could only sleep for an hour at a time, regardless of sleeping pills and pain medication. Using this biofeedback game, I am able to sleep for three to six hours at a time. Although it doesn't help the pain when I am awake, it gives me an escape from my pain without having to take more medication. The game is really just a computer video game with events that you control with your mind instead of buttons. You don't have to use the events that require raised energy, there are plenty that require you to learn to lower your respiration, blood pressure and anxiety.

That is a bit longer than it should have been. Please make some phone calls and find out if you are able to have groceries delivered. I know that is asking a lot from you, but I don't want you to get yourself into a postion that lands you in the hospital.

Sam2

[Nammu]

Sam2 Thanks for the biofeedback that is something I would like. It is mostly the pain and knowledge that movement brings pain. I find escape in books the way others find escape in sleep.

Many little things including severe financial problems have just added up to a point I am overwhelmed to the point of despair.

I do have frozen food and some canned stuff. It's my cat I worry about. He is used to getting 1/4 of a can a day along with his dry and he is a big cat, not overweight just big.

[optimize990h]

Originally Posted by sidestepper

I'm stuck. Ran out of litter last week, out of wet cat food yesterday, will soon run out of dry cat food. Thats more worrying to me than the car that I need to somehow I need to get in to my mechanic to fix. I still can't lift anything over 10 lbs so that stops me from using cabs, this may be the south but drivers do not get out of their cabs to help anymore. My frig has been empty for a couple weeks but frozen food is still good, I just can't seem to deal with anything. Every night I tell myself tomorrow I'm going to get up, get dressed, go get the mail(uncollected for over a month) see if I can lift the hood of my car(it's heavy and all I may need is coolant-I hope/dream but I suspect its the fan).

I tell myself I'm going to watch TV, I turned it on and some one local got drunk and shot his friend, the gun laws were raging, I shut it off and went back to bed with another book to escape reality. I did manage to watch some TV during the last week, but when I try to face the door inertia set in and I head for the bed. Its just too overwhelming. This is the first I've had my computer on for quite a while. I wanted to see if I could find a place to order groceries, pay bills but I can't seem to remember my passwords. I feel like there's a growing pyramid weighing me down.

I have similar issues in terms of paying bills and getting groceries. You are not alone feeling that way.

[Rose76]

I agree with Rohag. You need basic practical help. At the very least, I think you should have a case manager. From what I've discovered there are now two kinds. Besides the professional social worker kind that I consider traditional, there are people called "C.M.s" in my state, who are more like assistant case managers. They do just the kind of thing that you need help with.

I know about this because a family member of mine has both. He is able-bodied, but will even get assisted in cleaning his apartment. At least that's what he told me, and I believe him on this. He gets house visits to see what he needs help with. He has gotten really an amazing amount of help. It might reflect the values of my community. I don't know. I've heard elsewhere can be less generous.