[sadandalone22]

I can't take it anymore I am so depressed and don't know what to do. It seems like nothing is working I want to cry but I can't I hate myself. I am so frausterated I don't know what to do. I feel like No one even cares about me!!! I want to scream at everyone. I wish I could be somewhere else right now. I am in so much pain and I want to talk to someone but I can't I am all alone and to top it all off today was my moms birthday she would of been 52 today I miss her so much she was the only one who truely loved me!!!!!! I have no one now I am all alone and I can't stand it. I hate my life. I am so angry at life and everything in it. I am so tired of all the stress and everything. Oh I don't know what to do!!! I can't talk to my family they just make me all mad and they don't really care about what I have to say or how I feel. My mom was the only one who tried to help me. Did I metion I am in alot of pain emotionaly. well I am sorry for going off I needed to blow off some steam.

[PasDeDeux]

Vent away it may help a little but...I am sorry for all your pain and frustration, I too get overwhelmed at times. I wish I knew what to say or do to help. I wish I could take your pain away. I am also sorry you miss mom that hard I know

safe hugs

[(JD)]

sadandalone22, take a step back from this and observe the different segments of your emotions. try to file them into importance, look at your stresses, look at what is causing them, what needs to be done to resolve them, and take control.

Without regular healing, depression snowballs, and it is now when these feelings arise.

you dont hate yourself, if you did you wouldnt be here right now, you are prepared to change the way you feel, so how can you say you hate yourself. let yourself cry, let it all out. crying is like a pressure gauge, and you need to release it, things seem ever so slightly better afterwards. trust me.

people do care about you, we care here, and im sure your family care, they just dont know how to show it in the way you need it.

you say you want to talk to someone, you just did. by doing that post you expressed how you feel very productively. doing this often will ease your pain.

i know how it feels to miss a loved one like that, my mum died 5 years ago, and will be 52 by now, the same as your mum. i used to feel she was the only one who loved me, but i have realised that this isnt true. its the same for you. there are people who love you, you just havent noticed them.

feeling trapped is very destructive to us, i currently feel trapped and suffocated and it is so hard to carry on, but you can keep doing it. i know what needs to be done in my life to resolve this, which is why im currently looking for a new job, and a partner. there are keys to a happier life, and these lie within your passions, and thngs you want to do in your life.

the emotioanl pain you talk of will get better gradually, with help from others around you, like us here, or a therapist. do you see a therapist at the moment? if not i advise you do, it could be one of the best things you do for yourself.

Do you see what i have done here...i have catergorised your problems and worked through them one by one, paragraph by paragraph. i do it with my problems, and when i try to help those here, its what i do witht hem. its the best way it helps. for me anyway. i dont know about anyone else.

take care and if you need someone, im here for you.

simon

[FaithisAlive]

Aaaww.. sweetie... your mom is with you..... she lives on in your heart. And although she can't reach out and wrap her loving arms around you.. her love is right there for you to touch...

Sometimes we have to carry on with our lives knowing that one special person who made us feel special would want us to chug right along....

Tomorrow is a new day.. I hope you feel better when the sun comes up and the day starts...write to your mom when you are feeling this pain... maybe that would be a good thing to do. in a journal perhaps...

Thinking of you.. Faith

[Kellyann]

I do have to agree with everyone. First of all we do care for you. I know it is hard to believe, I do understand the feelings you are going through. Both my parents are gone, my sister who was my best friend is gone. I have had no one to talk to, I just get blown off, everyone telling me to stop feeling sorry for myself.
Your mother is with you, she is in your heart, your memories keep her with you. Just as my parents and my sister are with me. It may sound weird, but with no one to talk to, I write my parents and my sister. Yes, I know no one would every read it, but it is a way for me to get things out , no one criticizes me about it either.

Hang in there, if you need to talk, pc me anytime

[wisewoman]

We all need to be loved and held sometimes. I can do it in my heart with my dearest friend who died abruptly. Can you picture your mom resonding to your needs right now? What would she say? What would she do? Would she speak or just hold you? Would she validate your feelings? Do this for yourself. Maybe sharing out loud here the ways your mom comforted you would help.