[kare2bear]

I got pretty upset with my therapist today during our session. I've been dealing with treatment resistant depression for years..on and off many diff. meds with minor improvement. I'm pretty high functioning and work full time.. so i can appear to have things under control....but suffer inside. I started on a new med a few months ago and it seems to have provided some relief..but I've hita wall.

I mentioned ketamine treatment to my T and she brushed me off saying it was only a last resort for those with verry serious depression(ie hospitalized). It really pissed me off...like my issues and suffering weren't worth looking into different treatment options...

So Iemailed my T and told her I was taking time off. She said ..ok and to take care...ughhh..I wanted her to be more concerned..but she played the healthy part and let me go..

Now I don't have anyone to talk to...so I'm writing to psych central to get it out of my head so I dont obsess about it

Thanks

[ThisWayOut]

It can be difficult... did she know how you have been struggling? maybe it's time for a new T? Though they cannot read minds, and sometimes cannot see through all the defenses we put up...

[kare2bear]

Thanks for your response..my therapist has known me for years. But i think she deals with some very outwardly suffering patients and can miss the subtle signs of chronic depression.

The old saying "the squeeky wheel gets the oil " fits the bill here. But thats not how i express myself..

Thanks again

[gracez]

ack. that's difficult. do you wish you could continue with her? If so, then maybe you could make it happen. Or maybe it's time for a change and someone else could also be a good match for you. It sounds like you've valued therapy. If you want therapy, then I hope you can make it happen with the old therapist or finding a new one. Regardless, PC is a GREAT resource. Please come around and post your thoughts.

Gracez

[bharani1008]

It's a shame that the squeaky wheel thing applies even to trained professionals. That must really hurt. Just because you are better in control doesn't mean that you don't still have things to work through. Maybe it's time for a change. Try not to let this set you back.

Rant and rave all you want to here. We're listening.

Let us know how things go for you

[Pierro]

I think I would try anything to get better. Does she realise how upset you were, I don't know you, but I think you are so used of keeping the good side out that you cannot let your emotions show and the therapist is not picking up on the real you. You are doing so well to work full time, I was working full time but couldnt do it any longer. I wish you all the best and hope that your new treatment works out for you.

[kare2bear]

thanks to all of you for responding. It can get pretty lonely when you think there is no one else that thinks and feels the things you do.

Of course i've been obsessing about my therapist all day today.. checking my email and hoping she would touch base with me. What do I really want her to do? Beg me to come in and say that she really likes me and wants to hear what I have to say? Is that even realistic?? Once I put it down in writing it seems pretty silly. I want her attention and want her to be thinking about me just as much as I'm thinking about her... but I know that's not true. SHe's a professional and knows how to set up healthy boundries.

It feels like a break up.. I've been seeing her for years. My next session is in 4 weeks.. and I usually go every week. So this is a big thing for me. It's a test to see if I can manage on my own or if I start to crumble.

thanks again for such thoughtful responses.. it's just nice to air out my feelings in a place where we all have some type of issues we're dealing with.

take care

[LadyShadow]

Hi kare2bear,

I have been seeing my T for years too (7 to be exact) and if I had been upset and said I want to quit therapy, I would think he would put up a bigger fight for me. I totally understand where you are coming from. You want her to care, you want her to fight to keep you.

Best thing to do is to go to your next session an talk about what happened. Tell her your feelings and try to be as clear as possible, because its true they can't read our minds. If you still feel she doesn't care. its best you get a new T. You want to feel important even if you are the client, you want to feel like you matter to your T.

Good luck and vent all you want, PC is the place to do it!

[Cheshire Grin]

kare2bear

I saw the same therapist for almost 10 years, then he switched jobs to an administrative position about 8 months ago to be closer to home and avoid long commutes. It made me really sad at the time, but now that I've found a new therapist, I realized that this change was a really good thing.

I stopped going to therapy for 6 months. Gradually, I disintegrated emotionally. I have almost put myself in the hospital a few times. I still feel close to doing that now.

I tried a local psychologist, but I felt like he was a very dismissive clock-watcher. I went twice to see him, but was very uncomfortable with some techniques he wanted to try on me. I never went back.

I found a new female counselor who's a bit of a drive from where I live, but I already feel like I'm making progress in areas that my long-term therapist didn't understand. So I'll be seeing her for my 3rd appointment next week.