[skstar412]

I don't understand myself anymore. I just want to give up. I've been living with depression for as long as I can remember. I also have terrible anxiety. I got it all from my mother who suffers from the same thing. She is on medication and is doing fine. I am too but it's doing nothing. I feel so lost in a world that is so big. I feel like I am the only one that feels this way. All I want to do everyday is sit on the couch and cry but I can't cry. I have so many different emotions running through my head at every point in the day. I want to sleep all the time but I have issues sleeping. It's a never ending cycle. I feel like I have no one to talk to and of the few friends that I have who would want to listen to a miserable person all the time? I'm backing off of every social situation I have and just don't involve myself with other people. I've never been in a relationship because I don't feel that I'm good enough for anyone and who would want to deal with my issues anyways? I feel so trapped in this body. All I do is go to work everyday and I have to put on a fake face and pretend to be happy. I'm sick of being fake. I just want to be like everyone else...

I'm sorry you're having depressive feelings, Skstar412. You could be helped so much if
you would request an appointment with your physician and discuss your feelings with him.
He might recommend that you talk to a psychiatrist who can treat you effectively with
medications to correct the chemistry in the brain that might be the cause of your
depression.

It can be inherited, and since your mother is experiencing the same thing, there is
a chance that you have inherited it.

Please make that appointment and talk to a specialist who will prescribe medications
appropriate for you so that you can function as you wish.

It's really a blessing to get that help you need for better feeling tone. Almost all of
us do have help in that way.

Take care.

I feel this exact same way! I think I'm going to have to make myself seek professional help.

[healingme4me]

Have you told your doctor that you are still crying on meds?

And are you in counseling, also? Pretending to be happy, just masks the real you!!

And to be like everyone else?! Is that a perception, that everyone else is happy? Or something else?

If we were all alike, this world would be a very boring place to live in, would it not?

Originally Posted by skstar412

I don't understand myself anymore. I just want to give up. I've been living with depression for as long as I can remember. I also have terrible anxiety. I got it all from my mother who suffers from the same thing. She is on medication and is doing fine. I am too but it's doing nothing. I feel so lost in a world that is so big. I feel like I am the only one that feels this way. All I want to do everyday is sit on the couch and cry but I can't cry. I have so many different emotions running through my head at every point in the day. I want to sleep all the time but I have issues sleeping. It's a never ending cycle. I feel like I have no one to talk to and of the few friends that I have who would want to listen to a miserable person all the time? I'm backing off of every social situation I have and just don't involve myself with other people. I've never been in a relationship because I don't feel that I'm good enough for anyone and who would want to deal with my issues anyways? I feel so trapped in this body. All I do is go to work everyday and I have to put on a fake face and pretend to be happy. I'm sick of being fake. I just want to be like everyone else...

[missminnie]

I understand, i was the exact same way, still am a bit but i'm getting better,

you should really talk to your doctor and get him to switch your meds, i know people in my family who have to get them switched all the time because they stop working.

Keep us all updated on how you're doing(:

Feel better

[skstar412]

Yes they know. We're in the process of changing around meds. I am in counseling. Probably the best thing I've ever done for myself. I don't want everyone to be the same and I know everyone isn't, it would just be nice to feel how some of the people I see everyday do.

[skstar412]

Originally Posted by missminnie

I understand, i was the exact same way, still am a bit but i'm getting better,

you should really talk to your doctor and get him to switch your meds, i know people in my family who have to get them switched all the time because they stop working.

Keep us all updated on how you're doing(:

Feel better

Thanks for all the support. We are trying to change meds now but it's such a slow process that I get annoyed really quickly. We'll see how these changes go. I have no patience anymore.

I'll let you know how I am. It's nice to know that people out there that you don't know really care.

[skstar412]

Originally Posted by Cracking Slowly

I feel this exact same way! I think I'm going to have to make myself seek professional help.

If its one thing I am a huge advocate for its professional help. I do see a psychiatrist and a therapist and my therapist is what gets me through the week. I have so much to work through but I'd be in an even deeper hole without her.

[AV747]

I am very sorry. I understand you like no other, because I feel the same. Sometimes such a strange exercise helps me : I put before a some simple goal, for example, take the twine for a week, and every day I train on this till I find what I wrote. Goals can be completely different - read a book, watch a series of films, river, mountain climbing, learn to play a new song on the guitar... Important constantly to do it, to observe the discipline. Such an exercise advised me to my therapist, and to me it really helps. Hold on, everything will be fine!!!

[skstar412]

Originally Posted by AV747

I am very sorry. I understand you like no other, because I feel the same. Sometimes such a strange exercise helps me : I put before a some simple goal, for example, take the twine for a week, and every day I train on this till I find what I wrote. Goals can be completely different - read a book, watch a series of films, river, mountain climbing, learn to play a new song on the guitar... Important constantly to do it, to observe the discipline. Such an exercise advised me to my therapist, and to me it really helps. Hold on, everything will be fine!!!

I do the best when I'm distracted and up and moving but unfortunately I just had knee surgery and can't do what I love (exercise and karate) so I've become even more depressed.