[gracez]

Every day I feel like I've reached rock bottom and there's nothing to live for, so there's no difference. I don't understand the cliche you have to reach bottom before you go up, or putting a positive spin sort of thing on bottom because I feel each day is rock bottom.What do you do if every day is rock bottom?

[bharani1008]

Hi Gracez I'm sorry you aren't finding enough to make you feel better. I'm sure you've said so somewhere but if you are on meds maybe you need an adjustment.
Try to get through the and do 1 thing that you enjoy.
Just wanted you to know I saw your post

[ThisWayOut]

I can relate to that. I think people try to put a positive spin on it because they don't know what else to do with that info. I'm sorry you are having such a rough time. When I was at my lower points, they would last for months and I would see no end to it. It never felt like it was getting better, but somehow it always eventually did. I would say I hit "rock bottom" about a half-dozen times in life so far, and each was different.
Are you in therapy? Can you talk to your therapist about all this? Is there anything that helps you get through the days - even if it feels stupid and like it only makes a tiny dent in the day? (I say it like that because I tend to feel that the things suggested to me to do are stupid, but it's because I'm in a depressive fog and can't see their value at the time). Sometimes it's the little things that help. I've found I value nature a lot, as well as time to myself. Even though I know it helps me balance, I find it hard to keep up with. If nature is something you find soothing, would it be possible to go spend some time outside? I like to take my coffee on the patio in the mornings to watch the sunrise and the world wake up. Sometimes I bring a dog or 2 out with me, and the outdoor cats will come join me. When I'm not depressed, I know how incredibly balancing this is to me, but when I'm down, I find it hard to do. Is there anything that helps you feel calm when you are not depressed? Can you try that? ((hugs))

[gracez]

Hi, thanks both.

Yes, the feeling has lasted almost a year. In Jan I started on antidepressants, have tried 3 different ones, prescribed by the crisis center, but they have not helped. I haven't had ability to have a doctor follow me and change dosages or meds - since they do not provide that service.

There's nothing that gets me thru the day or gives me a little comfort. None of the things I used to enjoy or get comfort from are enjoyable anymore.

Sometimes reading a novel does ( I read at least one a day) but sometimes I can't even read. And I basically spend my life trying to zone out.

I talk to a therapist once a week now and still feel this way. I just qualified for services after 9 months of trying - I am qualified as SMI since now the depression has gone on severely for over a year, I can get services, whereas before, as a poor person I couldn't. Don't ask - this state is pathetic, not even medicaid.

Anyway, I see a doctor on Friday and maybe I'll get a drug that helps finally? This doesn't make me feel hopeful though. The others haven't worked. And even if I feel better on a drug my life is still a mess and I don't like my life.

[ThisWayOut]

if the meds can help ease the depression a bit, you may be able to start moving your life in the direction you want. I'm sorry accessing services has been so difficult for you. I remember talking about that on another thread. I had similar difficulties myself in this new state. There is some hope now though - you are seeing a therapist and will get a chance to see a dr. The right med and/or right therapy can make a huge difference.

[H3rmit]

Originally Posted by gracez

I talk to a therapist once a week now and still feel this way. I just qualified for services after 9 months of trying - I am qualified as SMI since now the depression has gone on severely for over a year, I can get services, whereas before, as a poor person I couldn't. Don't ask - this state is pathetic, not even medicaid.

Anyway, I see a doctor on Friday and maybe I'll get a drug that helps finally? This doesn't make me feel hopeful though. The others haven't worked. And even if I feel better on a drug my life is still a mess and I don't like my life.

I'm glad you have a therapist now and have qualified for more services. I am hoping for you that something gets you some movement so you can start to progress.

The rock bottom thing is a cliche from certain self-help approaches. It doesn't seem to be relevant much of the time.

[bharani1008]

I'm hearing you, dear. Sending warm feelings to you

[herethennow]

Glad that finally you have access to services. Hope it'll work for you

[Fuzzybear]

sending gentle hugs

[avlady]

Huggs!!! I know what you mean about hitting rock bottom, Maybe we don't actually hit rock bottom, we think we do, because of circumstances in our lives and people use that phrase to explain where they are at the time emotionally. It's just a phrase maybe used in the wrong sence sometimes but that is how we feel about our circumstance.

[Clara22]

Hi Gracez,
I do not have a good piece of advice for you but I will share my experience anyway. I think I reached by lowest point two times: the first time it was somebody else who shaked me up. The second time was that my mom got very ill. I can see there were external things, that is why this is not helpful but perhaps somebody else can think about how to get something "external" to help us to raise above.