Am I Putting All My Eggs In One Basket?

I should be thrilled and I should be dancing around! I finally got an appointment with the doctor that I've been waiting for since April of this year. I think I was happy for about 20 minutes. And I started to think....And I started to get anxious.
Am I looking for a miracle in this dr? I'm kidding myself if I am! Part of me is though, can't lie! Why can't I be happy about it? Bec this has happened before along time ago & that pd was horrid. Am I putting all my eggs in one basket thinking this dr will have all the answers? I just don't wanto go in there & get my hopes crushed. In reality there can only be a med change in the future. I've been on all kinds of meds & med combinations for 23 yrs. I refuse to do any more ECT. What else is there? I can't afford TMS. What else is there for drug resistant patients & why do I think this dr knows. Bec their recommended? Hard to get into see? Do I have stars in my eyes & I'm not seeing this for what it really is? A chase scene.
I don't wanto hurt anymore or be hurt anymore, but I wanto be helped so badly! Not a great attitude to have to see a new Pdoc I guess.

Anyone in my boat? Older? Been around the block many times w/ depression & still....hoping?

Where there's life there's hope!

Hello, Patagonia. Sounds as if you have tried out quite a few baskets - and found little help. I hope this new doctor will listen and respect all your efforts to find a way out.

Short of a complete cure, what treatment outcome would make you feel as if you had made real progress?

Hi Patagonia, I'm older and had depression for as long as I can remember. Had plenty of counselors, a few psychiatrists, lots of meds, and still depressed. I'm waiting to see right now if I can get approved to see a psychotherapist for the first time, but I also wonder if I'm just hoping for answers that should have been there already.
I don't think we have a choice, we cant give up hope.
think you should hang on to any hope you have. You will soon know and maybe this doctor will have help and answers, I wish you all the best!

I had a 9 yr livable bubble from my depression. Not sure how or why, but I found a med combo that just worked. I was happy w/ that outcome, at peace w/ my body & myself. I still had bad days, weeks or a month here or there but I could fight it & work w/ it.
Now I feel too old & too tired. I've tried the new meds out & they're still all the same. I think hope can be dangerous emotion. Sometimes hope has to step aside for acceptance.
I can't keep chasing rainbows. I'm going to have to deal w/ depression until the day I die.

"Livable bubble" - I like that!
Something changed, and aging and what accompanies it may be an important part of the change.
As much as I do not wish to agree, I agree.
Speaking only for myself, at some point in the past 15 years I "set aside hope." My hope is boxed up in the attic; it lost its usefulness as a day-to-day tool in living with depression.

Best wishes on returning to a perhaps modified livable bubble.