really new here

Hi i'm a newbie,
ok so i guess i'll just start with a little about me.
i was diagnosed bi-polar at 17. a year later my mom who was my best friend died and i spiraled into a really dark and lonely place. i was cutting and tried to die a few times. i started self-medicating and experimented with a bunch of drugs. when i was 23 i found out i was pregnant and have spend a lot of time and effort trying to get better. i've had a lot of trouble with relationships but i hate being alone. i'm trying to make a better life for my children and me and have been going to school trying to have a career not just a job. i work part-time and i push myself way to hard. i want to slow down but i don't want to fail. i'm overwhelmed and scared and i feel all alone. i'm soooo afriad that i'm going to screw up my kids. i'm hoping that this is a place where i can find some help and support.

Sounds like you are on the right track of putting your life back together. Just make sure you take a little time for yourself, just to relax. You seem to be working very hard to take care of your children, just let them know you love them. That's the important thing.

Hello & Welcome, Qtpiwitch.

If you are a full-time mom and a full-time student and work part-time, then your are living 2.5 lives simultaneously. Yes, that's overwhelming. Meds and therapy can compensate for only so much (and it varies from person to person).

Taking the long view, do you see where you might be able to scale back in the short run?

Make yourself at home, Qtpiwitch.

thank you guys so much for the warm welcome.

Hi. You are doing a lot....
I don't consider slowing down to be related to failing. We all, well or not, have to slow down from time to time.
Is there anything you can cut back on? What are your priorities?
Putting a thing on hold only means that it's temporary. You can always pick it up again.