Does "fake it till you make it" actually work?

Multiple therapists/ people have told me to do this. I have no interest in doing anything but I am going through the motions. I read everyday,but I can't get lost in the story like I used to. Instead I have to force myself to finish a chapter. I loved to cook and bake but my creativity to create new recipes is gone.

So... does this going through the motions ever work? If you did it how long did it take for the enjoyment to return? And if it doesn't why do the docs keep telling me this is a good idea.

Personally, I have not found it to work for me. If I try to do the hobbies I used to do and force myself, they never come out right. Or I just flat mess them up.

At work, I have to force my self to be happy and in a good mood since I am at the front desk. It, however, does not change the way I feel on the inside or make me happier when I leave work. Maybe for some it works but not for me.

Good for you for doing things even when u don't feel like it, that's a feat in itself.
I'm going through the same thing.... The idea behind doing something instead of waiting until you FEEL like doing it is so that we will actually do it and possibly end up enjoying it. I still have a hard time enjoying things, but I do get some sense of satisfaction when I get things done vs avoiding/doing nothing. So it kind of does work....actually There was a time where I've had my partner force me to go skating, I felt like crying/having a panic attack but in the end I was like a kid smiling as I skated and had fun which rarely happens.... I think it's called "behaviour activation" when struggling w motivation because of the depression. I think it's helpful as long as it's done in somewhat a baby step approach, otherwise it's overwhelming...at least for me.

I thinking it doesn't help me too. I can't imagine forcing myself to do some stuff. It would only make me tired hate it more and feel less like doing it.

I have never got the enjoyment back for baking like I used to, but, I still make bread simply because my kids love it and its good for them. I guess you have to keep on keeping on! I think I have changed forever and think that I will never be the person I was before but I make the best of it. Take care.

I'm struggling with this, too, and I'm not sure it helps but at least sometimes it means I get up and do something, which can be a relief.. Maybe it has to do with our intentions--"I'll give it a fair try" vs. "I am forcing myself to do this (or feel forced to do this"???

I guess it depends on what I'm doing. There are very few things that I really enjoy, but making music is one of them. I was feeling really horrible a few weeks ago and finally got myself to play a bit more and felt immensely better. Unfortunately, I haven't been able to get myself to do that since then.

well i think it works till some extent. when ur probs have a deep root then i think u need to be aware/solve the cause of ur probs and maybe then use the "faking". tc

Dear Curupira,

The "fake it till you make it" does not work. But "fake it till you BECOME it" works.

When you talk about "making" it, it is superficial. Something like a label. But when you become it, it gets ingrained into your system, your attitude, your behavior.

You don't achieve anything until you BECOME it.

All the best for your journey.

This is interesting and touches on that subject.

https://www.ted.com/speakers/amy_cuddy.html

"Fake it until you make it" has not worked for me. I suspect it may work for a percentage of depressed individuals, particularly those whose depression is milder.

Oh my goodness. Thank you so much for all the responses. Yoda I will absolutely check out that talk. I love TED.

Not in my experiance....in my experiance it turns into 'fake it till you lose it'.

And if one hypothetically doesn't 'become' it then what? I mean in theory what you suggest seems to indicate someone could make them-self mentally ill by simply acting like it which I am skeptical of. So not so sure someone who's mentally ill can just fake they aren't and become 'non mentally ill'.

Too each their own though that is just how I feel about the matter.

It was true, then after 41 years one would think that I would have perfected being happy, confident and self-assured.

But the opposite is true. I'm falling apart and can't carry the load anymore.

I... think it works for smaller problems but the thing is that especially if you use it for a longer period of time it just eats away at you until there is barely anything left. For example, practicing piano has always been a pain for me but I grew to enjoy it mainly through repetition. But in the case of depression and the like all that has come out of it is: ignoring the real problem and just not thinking about it. Which works for maybe a short while but it ends up taking so much out of you that you collapse.

I think a saying that better fits my own depression is "Don't give into it today. And if you can't muster up the strength, take a break and try again." :/ it's rough

Fake it till you make it, hasn't ever worked for me either. I have met people who are "faking it" and it shows. I myself tried it and all that it did was make me tired and irritable lol. That part, I wasn't faking Sometimes for me the things people offer are well meant (?) maybe....but platitudes usually come up in awkward silences for most folks who are at a loss for something kind and or helpful to say. Sometimes, silence is best, but we're human.

I've tried too. It helps somewhat? But not really.

It can and does work, but I find I have to work so dang hard to maintain it that it slap wears me out sometimes ...

I've been faking it since I started at my first college. Completed the two year course... Spent months trying to get a job to no avail and the job centre shoved me into another college, that's basically for young people who can't get a job because they are trying to kick as many people as they can off job seekers, to make their statistics look better. Anyway, the whole faking it made things so bad that I ended up getting diagnosed with severe depression. I'm sick and tired of faking it. So... No it doesn't work at all for me.

I have to say that it didn't work for me. It simply made me more distressed. I hated doing things that I used to love with the realization that I no longer loved them. It was like grief got added to the depression.

I agree ^^^. I do find, however, that I need to be on the proper medications in order to be able to work with myself cognitively. Once my meds and moods are decently stabilized I find that "faking it until I become it" can be a very useful tool.

Didn't work for me. More like fake it 'til it breaks you.

Far better to learn to listen for my own truth, and act accordingly. There are no guarantees in life, so it's best to put my efforts towards things that genuinely matter to me.

Faking works for learning superficial social rituals that are oh-so-important for surviving in society, though. I couldn't learn those intuitively. I'm too clueless about people things.

I dont think so... At least not for me. It would be great though, at least you could get day to day things done. Maybe a good way to look at it is to just go through the motions so that you can function, and seek help at the same time. The worst thing is to break down completely and have to start again from scratch. Even so, I dont think that just living like a robot will make anyone feel better without really digging deep and working through your emotions.