[Gigabyte]

For years I've gotten waves of depression that lasted for a while, but I'd eventually pull out of it. But now it's worse than it's ever been and I don't know what to do about it. I can't even fully explain why I feel like this. I have sat down multiple times and tried to figure out what is making me feel this way but never actually figure it out. Nobody knows, and I can't find the courage to tell anyone. I want someone to notice, because I know the only way I'll be able to tell someone is if they directly ask me. People have mentioned to me a few times that I seem different and less optimistic than usual, but even then I can't bring myself to tell them. It just keeps getting worse and I don't know how to handle it anymore.

[ImNotHere]

Depression can have many different causes, so trying to figure out what exactly is causing your depression may be difficult. I know you said you do not have the courage to tell anyone but have you ever been in therapy or on any medication? If not I think therapy might be able to help you feel better.

You sort of have to help yourself before other people can help you, and if they do not know then they cannot help you. I am sorry you are struggling lately.

[Gigabyte]

Originally Posted by ImNotHere

Depression can have many different causes, so trying to figure out what exactly is causing your depression may be difficult. I know you said you do not have the courage to tell anyone but have you ever been in therapy or on any medication? If not I think therapy might be able to help you feel better.

You sort of have to help yourself before other people can help you, and if they do not know then they cannot help you. I am sorry you are struggling lately.

I'm not on any medication nor am I taking therapy. Therapy would probably help, but I just can't bring myself to tell someone. I also don't even know who I would tell. I've considered telling my mother, but she's going through a lot and I don't want to add to that. It's just a really hard thing to bring up to someone.

[smmath]

I do agree it can be difficult and scary to tell someone you are struggling, especially mentally. But I do think it is an important step to take. Can you email a therapist in your area and ask some things about the process? It might be easier to email a stranger than to tell someone you are close to right now.

One way I like to bring up the topic of depression is to ask a question. For example, I would ask a friend: "Have you ever had depression?" Then no matter what their response is I would say: " Well I am experiencing it. "

I think having a guide in a way of how to bring it up might make it easier. Could you email your mom, and ask her how she is to start a conversation? Sorry I am all of the place.

[The_little_didgee]

Originally Posted by Gigabyte

For years I've gotten waves of depression that lasted for a while, but I'd eventually pull out of it. But now it's worse than it's ever been and I don't know what to do about it. I can't even fully explain why I feel like this. I have sat down multiple times and tried to figure out what is making me feel this way but never actually figure it out. Nobody knows, and I can't find the courage to tell anyone. I want someone to notice, because I know the only way I'll be able to tell someone is if they directly ask me. People have mentioned to me a few times that I seem different and less optimistic than usual, but even then I can't bring myself to tell them. It just keeps getting worse and I don't know how to handle it anymore.

I can definitely relate.

I have no idea why I feel depressed, which makes it really hard to tell others. They all want to hear valid reasons.

People definitely noticed a profound change in me. They have asked me about it, but I haven't been able to respond.

My journal has been my release. I think it is preventing me from losing it.

I don't feel that it helps to tell people that have never experienced depression.
They simply would never understand it.

You need to get help. Tell your mom. Look her in the eye and say "I need help".

[Stronger]

I went through a lot a few years ago and thought I was over it until this past October I started slipping again. Didn't know how to tell anyone. Even my best friend, I just couldn't bring myself to do it. So, like you, I decided to just wait till someone asked me. Well, BAD idea. Finally I got back into counseling and made some other changes...but I didn't do enough soon enough. Had I told someone and gone back into counseling back in October, then I would not have had the major depressive episode that I had about a month ago. I was in a fog, and couldn't trust myself, and basically did some pretty stupid things that put me back in the hospital.

Maybe try writing out what your going to say, and tell a friend. Then have that friend help you figure out what to say to your mom. If all else fails, you're allowed to go into counseling without your parent's knowledge once you're 14 (I don't know how old you are).
If you go to a church, try reaching out to a pastor, youth pastor, rabbi, priest, etc. They can be really understanding and quite helpful. You could try going to a school counselor and telling them. You could also call a crisis line (you don't have to be in a crisis to call one) and ask one of those people for advice on what to do. Those people are also really helpful.

But no matter what you do...do NOT keep quiet. That is the worst thing you can do. I know it's not easy, but you are strong enough! You can do this! Write that on your hand so that when the moment comes and your heart is pounding in your throat, you're sweating like mad and you want to cry and hide in a corner, you will remember the truth. Because yes, yes, my dear, you CAN do this!!

[Altered Moment]

I would start by listing your symptoms. Make a thourough list of what is different now than what you normally are. Sleep appetite mood motivation energy level crying. Look up the symptoms and see how many apply to you. Then tell the person that would most likely help you get help. Like taking you to an appointment with a therapist.

[Fuzzybear]

[catsrhelm]

You have to tell someone. Your depression will only worsen if you keep it bottled up. You can PM me if you wish.

[Gigabyte]

Originally Posted by Stronger

I went through a lot a few years ago and thought I was over it until this past October I started slipping again. Didn't know how to tell anyone. Even my best friend, I just couldn't bring myself to do it. So, like you, I decided to just wait till someone asked me. Well, BAD idea. Finally I got back into counseling and made some other changes...but I didn't do enough soon enough. Had I told someone and gone back into counseling back in October, then I would not have had the major depressive episode that I had about a month ago. I was in a fog, and couldn't trust myself, and basically did some pretty stupid things that put me back in the hospital.

Maybe try writing out what your going to say, and tell a friend. Then have that friend help you figure out what to say to your mom. If all else fails, you're allowed to go into counseling without your parent's knowledge once you're 14 (I don't know how old you are).
If you go to a church, try reaching out to a pastor, youth pastor, rabbi, priest, etc. They can be really understanding and quite helpful. You could try going to a school counselor and telling them. You could also call a crisis line (you don't have to be in a crisis to call one) and ask one of those people for advice on what to do. Those people are also really helpful.

But no matter what you do...do NOT keep quiet. That is the worst thing you can do. I know it's not easy, but you are strong enough! You can do this! Write that on your hand so that when the moment comes and your heart is pounding in your throat, you're sweating like mad and you want to cry and hide in a corner, you will remember the truth. Because yes, yes, my dear, you CAN do this!!

I'm 19, so I can do it without telling my mom. She's going through a divorce and some other stuff so I don't want to stress her out more. My college offers free counseling, so I think I might try that and see if they can get me set up with a therapist. I have a friend who I know used to suffer from depression. I think I'll try talking to her about it since she is able to relate.

[Stronger]

Good luck!! You're doing the right thing I know that it's hard, but you'll be so so glad that you did it.
And you can always pm me anytime you ever need to talk. I'm here for you.

[Gigabyte]

I was planning on talking to my friend about my depression today and was also planning on talking to one of the counselors at my college. But now I can't do either. My friend had a huge breakdown yesterday, so now there's no chance I'm going to bring it up to her. Also all classes were cancelled today due to weather so I won't be able to talk to a counselor. What are the chances.