Hi folks, just need to vent here and maybe get some input. What do I do when medication, weekly therapy and even my most recent inpatient stay (1 week) don't help the debilitating depression? I feel like I'm getting worse, not better. I'm in so much emotional pain it seems intolerable.

I have a job interview tomorrow and don't even know if I can get out of bed and make it to the interview, muchless work a full-time job. I feel like I'm out of options and just don't know where to turn.

What would you do in my situation? Will this ever end? The days just keep rolling by and I'm merely existing, not really living. Nothing gives me any joy whatsoever.

[gayleggg]

Hi, newgal. Sorry things aren't working for you. I understand. I've been battling it for close to 2 years. Nothing seems to be helping. But I do manage to hold on to my job. Granted, it's an easy one. If you can possibily make it to the interview, do go. A job could give you purpose and structure to your life. It would at least help keep your mind occupied. Good luck.

[regretful]

I think that I agree with Gayle...I'd get to the interview; but that is because I know that I function much better (and remarkably with an absence of depression) when I am working at something that I enjoy.

I was in a similar boat when I got out of the hospital...but I knew that staying home would simply worsen the depression; so now I get up and go to the office daily and work at something that I don't really enjoy...I dislike it more than you can imagine; but if I didn't, I would be just existing as you say.

Depression is a terrible illness...this episode for me has been persisting for several months (4 or 5 now)...but I'm slowly crawling my way back. Someone once had a perfect description of it...recovery from depression is like crawling across a sheet of glass...

I hope that things improve for you newgal.

Thanks for your input, guys. I feel so alone in this hell. When I was in my twenties, I had depression so severe that I couldn't get out of bed and go to my job in the morning. It was humiliating, and I ended up in the hospital. I have a great fear that will happen again if I get this job (just not being "able" to go). But what is the alternative? Staying home, spending endless hours on the computer and doing household tasks. Not really a way to live one's life. I used to be a productive, well-functioning person. What the hell happened?

[regretful]

I'm left thinking the same thing...2013 off medication, working full-time, and doing bookkeeping for a family business...not depressed. In fact, enjoyed life to the fullest. Every day was a new challenge. September 2013, quit my full-time job to return to family business. Dec 27, 2013 admitted to a psych ward...I never thought it could be this bad. My thinking, that I'm holding on to for dear life, is that if I functioned well in the past, then I can again, one day, function well. I know what you mean about the computer and household stuff...It's a bit too much to take in...everything is much better when you're not depressed. Now, food doesn't even appeal to me. So, I keep on keeping on, mainly for those that care about me, and maybe one day for myself.