When you don't want to do ANYTHING

Stronger · Apr 07, 2014, 06:49 PM

So you just offered me to go to this really awesome thing that I've wanted to do all my life? Um, well,

I think I'm just gunna

stay home instead (

). Why? Oh, well this week has just

taken it out of me

I guess.

I'm just really sad today.
Why?
I have no idea.

This is my laundry list of things to do today...make sure you're in a large room when you unfold it, because it is rather long. Am I gunna do any of it?
Well

maybe.

I should.

but...

Depression makes me feel like a failure.
And I just realized recently that my greatest fear is failure, so telling myself that I'm a failure is the worst insult I can give myself.

I know I'm not the only one.........right?

LaborIntensive · Apr 07, 2014, 06:56 PM

atomicc · Apr 07, 2014, 07:01 PM

You are definitely not alone, darling! I am sorry you are struggling so hard right now. Maybe you could start with a few small and easy things and accomplish them then work your way up to the harder stuff?
Make sure you give yourself lots of self love and acknowledgement along the way. You can do this

Idiot17 · Apr 07, 2014, 07:03 PM

oh, you're defintily not the only one.

hvert · Apr 07, 2014, 07:36 PM

Nope, you aren't the only one! I'm doing it right now -- I *should* be working on my project, but it's easier to come here and read new threads...

littlemiss44 · Apr 07, 2014, 07:57 PM

You aren't alone!! I cried last night for no reason at all. My bf asks me what's wrong honey? I just reply I don't know. I'm always alone with my thoughts and disappointments. This **** can drain all the energy right out of you. I'm so sorry yr struggling right now. It's a hard place to be. You aren't a failure. You are not yr illness. It doesn't define who you are. You are important. Worthy of love and care. Hugs to you.

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H3rmit · Apr 07, 2014, 08:18 PM

I'll do the stuff I'm supposed to do, more or less. But I really don't care. More and more I don't want to get out of bed in the morning. It's getting harder. That's new for me.

Apr 07, 2014, 11:26 PM

Depression has taken so many different cool opportunities from me as well :/ It sucks because you want it so much but you aren't ready at the time. If you can, try to use it as ammunition to get angry at your depression and hit the breaks as hard as possible to try and get it to stop running your life (which is ridiculously hard to do lol). But yes, I have shed many tears over the fact that I wanted to be ready for something and couldn't do it.

mulan · Apr 08, 2014, 11:18 AM

Of course you are not the only one!
Failure is not mesured by your will to do something. If it was true then I will be the biggest failure ever. One of my dreams is to live in a place, a forest, with no cold weather, no rain, just sun or shinning starts and be standing still there for ever. I sometimes almost could be an human statue.
There will be more opportunities for you, for acomplish your tasks, for going to that place you wanted to be... There will be other days.
I'm sorry you feel this way. My way to manage fealing like a failure because I can't do things do to depression, is going to the rout. Start blaming depression and stop blaming me.