In a dark dark place...

Hang on Secret. I don't see you as a broken toy that should be thrown out. You have been so kind and helpful to everybody here, including and especially me. This depression business is a miserable thing. I wish there was something that could make it better. But know we love you and we care. Hang in there and keep posting.

(((((((Secretwhisper))))))) Broken toys become the treasures of the future. Maybe I don't believe that, maybe you don't believe that, but the world is imperfect and has room for us all, whether we feel like we belong here or not.

Thanks guys I was hoping to be admitted to hospital today but there are no beds available for me. I was waiting all day for a phonecall and I just got it telling me that there aren't any. Instead the crisis team have said they will come see me tonight so I just have to sit around and wait for them now. I feel like it's all a bit unecessary now because I generally feel safer at the weekend anyway because my bf is home with me.

Hi secret, not unnecessary, really glad that you're feeling safe, but you do deserve their support. And they can always do some action planning with you for when/if you're feeling like that again, or advise on any changes in medication that might benefit you while they're there. And certainly nothing they should be dismissing in the way you've been feeling. Make the most of the visit, about time they're coming!!
And you know what, if the waits seeming long, frustrating............hang with us if it'll help. We care, and if you want to talk......we're here for you.
Alison

Your bf might find their presence comforting though. Might make him feel that everything isn't resting on his shoulders. I am not saying it IS and I dunno what he feels but it's quite possible..

Nevertheless.. The crisis team seam fat and probably need some exercising...

p.s (if anyone here belong to or know someone who belongs to a crisis team or this crisis team and find my comment insulting I apologise. Don't mean any actual harm.)

Lol you do make me laugh

They turned up at 11:45 last night when I was in bed so I didn't bother opening the door, I needed sleep more than I needed to see them. Just got a phonecall from them now telling me they'll come out today somewhere between 4 and 7pm so now I wait!

Hope the visit from the crisis team goes okay secret.

It went ok thanks, they think hospital is the best place for me right now but still no beds! Maybe tomorrow...

Hi secret, it is good that they've recognized/understood how hard things are for you. Hopefully tomorrow you'll get the real help you need/the help you deserve, but if you need any support until then, we're here for you.
Alison