It just doesn't go away.

Every morning essentially I wake up and remember how crappy I feel over all. Sure throughout the day I can find distractions, sometimes hanging out with family/friends/aquantinces can help and even be fun for a while. But then when I am alone sitting up all night or I get up in the morning and no one else is up or stuck with my own thoughts that sense of depression I guess you'd call it is back....or I guess it more never leaves. Anti-depressants I have had don't really help I do find cannabis helps my mood, but of course only temporary. Just can't get over feeling like a worthless piece of crap when I know I'm not or at least people tell me I'm not. I am in therapy but that doesn't really seem to do a whole lot either, except sometimes I am able to learn coping stratgeties to try which sometimes help a little but yeah....there is still something missing, perhaps its the PTSD as well as the depression combined causing this never ending feeling.

Just had to write down some depressed rambling.

I recognized the feelings, mostly mine come from depression from being bipolar, but your PTSD could be playing a big part in it. I hope it gets better soon. I'm glad you are learning technics to help you get through it. They do help sometimes.

Hellion, you're not alone. Neither meds nor therapy has helped the deep feelings of depression that are continually with me.

Just sucks if I could count the number of times I wake up with my first thought being 'oh god someone put me out of my misery' it would be a lot, I mean its not always 100% serious sometimes more sarcasm. And it seems all coping skills I can even almost make sense of only go so far, but glad I have some more ideas than I used to.

I feel the same. Sometimes I'll go to bed with not so bad thoughts but every morning, as soon as I open my eyes. My first thought is "I'm awake, another day to suffer." I stay distracted during the day but nights, mornings and times when I'm alone with my thoughts are the worst. I'm having my first therapy session this thrusday and I hope I can get some medicine prescribed but I've read a lot on here that therapy and meds don't even work. I'm worried they won't work on me because I want to feel normal again so bad.

I can relate a lot to what you wrote. Good luck. I hope you find something that will help soon.

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I feel the same way. Some days by the afternoons can snap out of it. Today, I can't. There seem to be something pressing in my head and causing the low sad emotion. It can be that there I nothing here for me but my friend. I need something good to happen. I read a lot of coping skills, but the don't help sometimes and other times, I don't want to do them. I don't want to feel this way anymore. Some says drugs help me but I stop taking them. This time it wasn't my choice. There was 2 weeks I felt good without drugs.

I wanted to rambling too today.

I feel like talking to people but when I did, there was nothing to talk about.

It gets better -- right?

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As far as I can tell maybe it gets better for periods of time, then its like you're just right back where you started, feeling like crap.

Yup...nothing more than I can say than what you said is exactly right on...

Didn't really feel like starting a new thread when I can just add to this one since its essentially the same issue. I'm not even actively suicidal but yet I keep having thoughts of methods and wanting to self harm in some way(settling for smoking cigarettes) but that's not even painful so doesn't effectively distract my brain from the mental crap. Very irritating but I seem to have it under control for the time being...I guess i am just really frustrated about how I feel. Not to mention I've met someone I might want to attempt forming a relationship with and I don't want to scare them away with my craziness, but then not sure i really want that relationship for the right reasons...what if more subconciously I just think having that would distract me and its not about really wanting to see how things go with them.

(((((hellion))))))