how to feel about a therapist

Ok... so I see on these threads a lot of people saying they rather be with their therapist to help them..

well... I recently accepted to myself that I need help with my depression and a therapist would be a great option. But the times ive gone I just feel as if its not helpful.. Maybe its just me or I chose the wrong therapist.. Like honestly I was waiting for 3 weeks to finally be seen and when I went I didn't feel any different..

is there something im missing?? Am I expecting too much from them or what is it.. I honestly need to overcome my depression...

I've much more experience with psychiatrists than therapists. My impression, however, is that individual, personal connection between client and therapist is critical to the value of the therapy. One therapist may be of no help; with another you might "click" and be able to make progress.

I like my therapist, but I'm not a person who is quick to trust or open up to others. I had a specific issue I wanted to work on with her (not my depression...though looks like we'll be getting into that next week). It took me nearly six months of meeting with her and working through getting to know how we work together for me to finally open up to her about the original issue. We did good work on other things in the meantime, but it took me a long time to get to the point with her.

I've had other therapists in the past. One I opened up to immediately, because I was in crisis at the time. I liked working with her, and started to feel better after about 10 sessions. I could tell we were making progress, but it took time to feel it. Another therapist I saw I didn't click with (when I was still a minor), and though I continued to go to her because my mom thought it was necessary, I don't think anything actually ever improved with her.

So I think both the right relationship and giving it some time are the keys. If you're naturally an open person, you might see improvement sooner than someone like me who is pretty closed.

Hi newbie, Welcome to PC!! Sometimes depression can be real tough to breakthrough, but well done on reaching for help with it!!
Then as you said it was just recently, so while it's really is good you sought help, there is the possibility it may take a while longer to work through it.
But perhaps you could talk to your T about how you're feeling the sessions are going, and about how you feel they could be improved on too.
That's not to say that you might not be right in thinking that you may have chosen the wrong therapist either, it's just that sometimes it can take a while to identify how it's going to go as you start building a relationship with them.
Still there is a forum on Psychotherapy on here as well, that you may find useful in discussing or checking out peoples experiences with T's and what you may be able to/should expect too.
Hope you find the site helpful, there are a lot of great people on here who will be able to give you advise and support.
Alison

Just keep looking until you find one you like.

Maybe it's the therapist...if you can't tolerate the time that you're spending with him/her, then find a new therapist. There's a lot of them out there in every community...

You put it down very well, newbie.
People discuss it like it's a big help and step to feeling better yet i haven't seen that at all in the past.
What is it that you need to overcome depression????

(((newbie33))) Welcome to PC. Therapist are great. But they are only as good as the patient. It will probably take a few visits with your therapist before you get comfortable with them. As you get to know your therapist things will change.

Remember depression is an illness that does not want you to get help so depression is going to do its' best to keep you from getting help. To get help with depression you need to be honest with your therapist. Depression will try to keep you from doing this.

You made a huge step by going in to get help. So give yourself some time. Keep us posted.

There are theories about empathetic therapy that say the relationship is the most important part of success. I am very lucky that my relationship with my pdoc is so good and that he is like a therapist.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Hello, newbie33. Therapy is a process. Dr. Grohol has a lot of useful information here:

Psychotherapy - Psych Central

I've never connected well with a therapist, and I often wonder if it's my fault. I really want to overcome my depression, and so of course I put forth all the effort... but I'm either left feeling the same or sometimes worse. Although as others have mentioned, I never saw one for an extended period of time. Maybe that's why no connection... I just don't know.