I can't handle it anymore

I've been really down for the last 20 months or so, and for the most part I've been able to handle my emotions, but recently I've just been in the gutter. The last few weeks I guess. I'm not finding anything really enjoyable anymore. Yesterday I just had these really, really dark thoughts about... Ending it all I guess, that I could not get rid of, no matter what I tried. I'm scared of what I'll do to myself in my sleep, and I haven't slept at all since Saturday. Any help?

((((Hugs)))))

Look, first of all you are worth having around. You need to stay. Please, contact a suicide hotline and get yourself into a hospital. Are you currently being treated? i have been where you are and let me tell you, things really will get better with therapy and medication. Please hang in there, I know it can be tough on the weekends. ((((Hugs again)))))

Thanks. I'm not currently being treated, and there's no way for me to do any of the things you recommend. I live with my mom, and her opinion is that this kinda stuff is somehow normal, so she won't even consider letting me go to a therapist, not to mention get some meds that would help.

Go yourself. in some states you only have to be 16 in order to get your own mental help. If she still wont and your underage that's neglect, go to a hospital if you have to, on your own. By law your mother HAS TO HELP.

if you are over 18 you will unfortunately have to do this on your own but the good thing is, your mother never has to know. Best to you, at the least call a suicide hotline. Please.

Thanks for the help. I'll call a hotline, and consider seeking further help. I really appreciate your help ((hugs))

Hey keep me updated ok? i care.

I don't have the guts to do this. I just keep on thinking about how my family will react, and it would drive me even deeper into my bad mood.

Family.....i hate that word. They keep you from doing things....
(((((Tyran)))))

Does all of your family share your moms views? But I get how worrying about how they'll react can be hard to seek further help since you don't want their judgement...my family is not quite that extreme but still hard for me to talk to them about mental health stuff. But if you do end up actually planning on harming yourself I hope you can get the help you need....intolerant family or not you have to do what you have to, to stay safe.

No, my siblings are all aware of my situation, and are really supportive. I'm just nervous about cost and my Mom overreacting or something

Its not your Mum's life, its your life you have to care about and take charge of. You can make your own choices regardless of what others think or say.

Thanks. I guess I'm used to living for other people, not myself.