Even though logically I know this will pass..

Emotionally/mentally I feel stuck. I feel trapped in my own life, with nothing to do but continue through it in this weird disconnected state. All I want is to feel balance, to feel content. I don't even care very much if I am 'happy', I just want to feel at peace.

During small moments (too few and far between) I am able to obtain it; peace. That scares me- like- maybe this is as good as it gets, and the moments of peace will be harder and harder to come by. That idea really makes me feel panicky. It makes me want to say **** it.

it is difficult when we are unable to find joy. I remember when life was like that for me. antidepressants really helped. now I just don't focus on the big picture. I stay in the now. I try to find the positive in the different things that I do do. I try to do things that make me feel good. I don't focus on the things that make me feel bad. I let those things go. I just hang on to the things that make me feel good. sometimes I really have to work hard for these things. get creative. take care.

All things do pass of course, and since you know this too will pass I am guessing that you suffer from episodes of this sort at times as did I.

Antidepressants have put an end to these episodes, tho' I watch myself like the proverbial hawk lest these dreaded/dreadful feelings sneak up on me again. Instead of being in the here/now and bewildered and fearful and hopeless, I can see life as it is. It may not be all I could wish, that would be asking a lot, but there are grounds for hope, maybe not miracles, but enough for patience, perseverance, resilience - this is what I hold myself to anyway. I hope you can find some perspective in your own way.

Sometimes I think we have to take life one day at a time. That feeling of peace. That is also what I strive for. I don't worry about happiness. I just want that sense of peace. I hope that this will happen for you as well.