[HopeSpringsEternal]

Okay...sooooooooo...I just took a quiz on here and the results say that I am probably SEVERELY depressed. HELLO!!?? I KNOW that I am not feeling great and that I am at a pretty low point in my life, but, I actually thought that my responses would indicate, maybe, a LITTLE bit of depression not SEVERE depression. Hmmmmmm...
I have felt like dog doo doo since about the beginning of October and at times since then I felt as if I was barely hanging on by a thread. I was crying and crying everyday, felt like someone had punched me in the stomach and knocked the wind outta me and I lost MAD weight since then...like over 40 lbs. But, now I only cry maybe once a week, I feel, mostly like I have caught my breath and I actually get hungry about every other day!! So, if I am SEVERELY depressed now....what the FLUCK was I experiencing from October until just recently??
I have started seeing a counselor who has said that I probably have some kind of anxiety problem. Never looked at it that way. But, then I went on WebMD.com and looked up anxiety symptoms, and, yep, sure enough, that is what I am experiencing even today. They say that anxiety and depression sometimes overlap. Okay. Great to know. Anywayzzzzzzz...my counselor says that I should make an appointment with my MD and get an Rx for something. I can only WISH that there is a magical pill or elixer that can take this anguish from me and quell my queezy uneasy feelings. This is not something I want to get used to. Not like I am seeking some "happy" pill, just want this feeling of dread to dissipate. Sooooooooo...what kind of pill does that? What would a doctor prescribe? And, do they work? Or do the meds just mask the symptoms I have described and replace them with...dry mouth, upset stomach, etc. etc. and other unsuitable side affects?
Do I sound angry? Geeze...sorry folks. This is just very frustrating. The people in my life say that I am just looking at everything from a negative standpoint. That my negativity creates the negativity in my life. Vicious cycle. Whatever. I understand the concept of creating your own reality, but, one must also accept the reality of the situation as well. Correct? I mean, you can't ever hope to get past this without accepting it for what it is. Right? I mean, sheez...I have been feeling like this since early October and have TRIED to think positive and create a different reality, but, the reality is....I'M DEPRESSED!!
Can anyone make ANY sense of this for me? Thanks for reading this and thanks in advance for any insight someone might have for me.
PEACE!

[sabby]

(((((Hope))))) Welcome to PC!

I'm sorry you are feeling the way you are feeling right now. You don't sound angry to me, more frustrated and scared than anything else.

Those little quizzes out there should be used as guidelines, not as a complete diagnosis. They are generalized and only meant to give you an "idea" of what you might be looking at for issues. At least that is my opinion of them.

I'm glad you are seeing a counselor and it sounds like he/she is suggesting a good thing in seeing your regular MD for medication. There are good medications out there that can "take the edge off" while not making you physically ill or feeling like you have absolutely no feelings whatsoever. Sometimes folks have to take a combination of medications to achieve the desired help. Everyone is different and their illnesses are different. Sometimes it takes a couple of different tries of different medications to find the exact doseage that will work for you. I know it's hard, but try to be patient when starting on medications, they don't work overnight in most cases.

Depression and anxiety sometimes do go hand in hand. I suffer from both on occasion. Sometimes I just have anxiety, other times I have just depression, then other times they both decide to derail me at the same time.

Not everyone has to be on medication for the rest of their lives. It depends on the kind of depression you are suffering from.

I wish you well in your journey and hope you find some relief soon. There are lots of good folks here that are willing to listen and lend a shoulder and/or advice on what has helped them through their illnesses.

Take good care!

Hugssssssss

hi hopes,

sorry you are feeling so bad at the moment. my test said the same, even though i'm up some days, down others,sometimesi feel i am self pitying and selfish,sometimes i just don't care.

i came on this site two weeks ago whilst feeling extremely low. i met some fantastic people. somehad the sameish problems as me, some had totally different problems. but we all feel the need for communicating, either to be helped or to help others.i hope you find some kind of peace in here, and help. pm me anytime. sometimes it's nice just to have an e.cuddle too.

take care, jinnyannxxxx

[HopeSpringsEternal]

Hi there:
It has been about a week since my initial posting and I still feel like sheet. I just started a new job at the end of January and my insurance hasn't kicked in yet so get a prescription for meds isn't forthcoming. I feel as if I will just come out of my skin at any moment but continue the charade that everything is just fine. I am not my usual laughing lovable self, so, these people at work must think this is who I really am. Someone with no sense of humor and who is always serious. NOT! But, I just have to keep moving forward walking around in this shell of myself. But, that is what is so bothersome. Evidently I can't even pretend that this is not how I feel because my demeanor is such that the negativity is oozing through my pores! I just want to feel better. I have my 3rd counseling session on Tuesday, but, I really don't see what every other week of counseling is doing for me. I need healing!! Not just "hang in there" until the next time I can sit for 50 minutes with a stranger and talk. When I leave counseling I don't feel like, "whew! that took a load off!" I feel more like, "what did I just do for an hour?" How long does it take for counseling to start working? How long does it take to get over a 7 1/2 year "marriage"? How long does it take to stop feeling inadequate, insecure, fat, ugly, worthless and tired? How long does it take to get over the fact that my virginity was stolen from me at 13? How long does it take to get over the fact that my mother beat me every day of my life until I was 16 and ran away from home for good? The fact that my most recent relationship failed, just puts me back in the head and heart space that I felt back then. Worthless and stupid. I KNOW that I am not ugly, I KNOW that I am smart, I KNOW that I am worthy...my head tells me that but, my heart just can't get on board!! OUCH!! It hurts so dam much!