This existence seems pointless but the after life does not

I’m losing more and more patience with life everyday. Now it’s got to the point where family, the only thing that kept me fighting is rapidly losing it’s effect. I have been working on my spirituality for many years now and have learnt about the other side and of what truly caused me to become the mess I am today. I suffer from social anxiety and depression and according to a healer it stemmed for years of declining self worth. I was a happy child but also hypersensitive to emotion, living on a low vibrational planet, it didn’t take long for negative emotions to destroy my reality. Growing up I was a bit of a retard, always wanting to play and be stupid. As I became conscious of reality things went downhill.

I begin working on the therapy but it is very slow progress and recently I went to back to feeling as low as I first started. I'm so over this pathetic existence and can't wait to pass over. For those who think this is the only existence you are mistaken. Your body and the physical world is what you can see, but we also have a spiritual body and coinciding with that is the spiritual plain of earth as does each planet.When we die or astral project out spiritual bodies separate from are physical and we are move to earth’s plain, I still have nof yet perfect astral projection but if I die I don’t have to.

*I don’t know for sure but I’ve heard there is the council of light residing in the highest vibration in the universe AKA heaven. That is where I look forward to existing, as a non physical entity, a spirit, there is no limits and no discomfort. It just doesn't make sense why people would want to put up wih the struggles of being human and the temporary life they live.

Hello & Welcome, Ascension21.
The struggle is agonising. Maybe it cannot make sense Now. Perhaps the Now will only make sense Then.

Please make yourself at home.

Spiritual beings having a human experience. There has to be some purpose and meaning to the human experience even with all the suffering we endure.

That once seemed appealing to me when I was medication but that no longer works. I'd wanted to get to the true cause anyway. It seems as though I have outgrown that purpose. It's probably due to my level of self worth but that's just how I feel at the moment.

Yes that is exactly was it is about, learning from your lives you lived on this earth and experiencing new things. However I have no interest in experiencing life, I'd rather be a spiritual being that watches over humans or represents the council of light, providing assistance to those in need and keeping the darkness in check.

We may have chosen this experience for whatever reason and have to see it though to the end, whatever end that may be. I don't know.

You might be very interested in this book-
A Brief Description of The Urantia Book | Urantia Book | Urantia Foundation

I read it and found it fascinating. I am not saying I believe it or not because I just don't know how the universe works.

Thanks zinco, that book does sound interesting. For a long time now spirituality has been my no. 1 priority in life, so im sure this book will be of interest and insight. I know there are people who have had contact with advanced celestial beings who are here to help guide us. I will let you know my thoughts on it.

Yes this life is kinda useless and don't see the meaning on it, i don't even know how i keep alive sometimes i feel so much pain inside me and i wonder how much more will i be able to handle but for now i keep on living, maybe things will get better? I don't know honestly but well, i can't give anyone a reason to keep living i don't have one myself but as long as i can handle my inner pain i will keep on living.

I don't believe in any of those things about afterlife tho, when i die i die simple as that.

It is very long and hard to read. Personally I like the last section on the life and times of Jesus Christ and read that twice. I am not a die hard christian or anything but found it very interesting.

Also I was very interested in "The Course in Miracles" for about three years.

http://www.acim.org/

That one is pretty popular and there are many group studies on it.

That book is indeed hard to read, interesting but didn't come across anything to do with humans purpose then again I did selectively read. There is just too much info in there that I don't care about right now. The last section you mentioned, does it have anything to do humanities purpose.

Alter, you need to release that pain, holding onto it will destroy you. Many people don't believe in after life, that is also why there are so many lost souls on earth because when they die they die they are afraid of this unknown reality so they linger around helplessly eventually becoming lost. Ghosts or spirits are proof of such unfortunate souls

Probably the gist is spiritual evolution. Most of that book I was not interested in either. But it was part of my searching. Course in Miracles too in which the main theme is forgiveness and that is how we become more aware of our true selves and our connection to creation. Getting rid of ego. Spiritual ascension and evolution is what intrigues me and this life plays a role in that.

Probably violating the rules of forum now talking about such matters.

From Urantia-

Yes spiritual ascension and evolution is what I'd dedicate my life to if it seemed worthwhile enough to do so. Our next stage of human evolution is spiritual ascension but world is so far from that right now. The ego rules the majority of this planet, it’s sad.

How would it be violating the forum rules, I think I grasped half of the full meaning from that paragraph. The message they were ttying to portray I think was that we begin our true meaning of creation and life when we have completed our journeys on earth. From here we expand to other universes becoming ascended souls

Well there are some rules about discussing religion I think.

What I find fascinating is how the ideas we are discussing or Buddhist philosophy is starting to jive with very real scientific theories in physics. Quantum theory and experiment, string theory and cosmology. We perceive so little of reality.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Yeh there would be but this is not religion, although the 2 are connected they are separate. Religion has set rules and traditions and is based upon different aspects of spirituality as spirituality is the universe, god, creator, personal growth and free will.

Yes in the years to come as we advance the connections between science and spirituality will unfold more and more.

It sounds as if you have a lot you can teach people. Please hang around and do it.

I'm mind blown by what I found out yesterday; apparently this earth and the local system is not real, it is a holographic simulation controlled by a consciousness computer system. The only thing real is our energy bodies. We also live the same life script over and over again with each incarnation and are each given missions by the hierarchy of light. There is much corruption within the hierarchy of light.