[twizzlerheaded]

Without going into too much detail, I just wanted to know what you guys thought about this. Sorry if this was already covered in another post.

Is there a difference between wanting to die and being suicidal?

I've never harmed myself in any way and as dark as things got, as bad as they were, always promised myself I would never do anything to harm myself. There was never even a moment where a plan or even brainstorming a plan took place. These feelings happened over a year ago, so no need to worry (FYI).

Is there a solid difference or is wanting to die the first step or warning sign that one would become suicidal?

[Altered Moment]

Wanting to die would be concerning. Suicidal thoughts are the next step. A plan the next step.

I think not wanting to live is different than wanting to die. Maybe you mean not wanting to live.

[twizzlerheaded]

Yeah maybe "not wanting to live" is a better way of explaining it. These were old feelings and I didn't want my T to misinterpret what I was trying to say. I don't want him to think I was or still am a threat to myself or others.

[Altered Moment]

Originally Posted by twizzlerheaded

Yeah maybe "not wanting to live" is a better way of explaining it. These were old feelings and I didn't want my T to misinterpret what I was trying to say. I don't want him to think I was or still am a threat to myself or others.

They normally won't think that unless you talk about a specific plan. You have to be an imminent threat to yourself or others. Of course it is a judgement call on their part. Not wanting to live and not wanting to die is a feeling I often get when depressed. Or even wishing God would just take me in the night. It is a long ways from being suicidal.

[twizzlerheaded]

Alright thank you again. I never knew how to accurately respond when asked if I were suicidal. I didn't want doctors to think I was a threat, in any aspect, but I wanted to get my graveness of how I felt across.

[lostinitall]

For me there is a difference. I have been through all the stages except for following through with the plan. Came close a couple of times but could never do it. It seems that there is a true desire to live which grabs at the last minute for me that is.

[Altered Moment]

Originally Posted by lostinitall

For me there is a difference. I have been through all the stages except for following through with the plan. Came close a couple of times but could never do it. It seems that there is a true desire to live which grabs at the last minute for me that is.

I think so too. There is a small spark of hope in there even if I am totally unaware of it. I can have it all planned out yet I will somehow make to see the pdoc and therapist. I won't talk about the plan but I will say I am suicidal. Very hard to extinguish that spark that lives within.

[TheOriginalMe]

I have a lot of suicidal ideation but no significant intent. I have a theoretical plan but I haven't actively made preparations. My psych nurse and pdoc take that quite seriously as there is the concern that it wouldn't take much on my part to think "*** it, I may as well". I don't want to harm myself and I am as scared as hell of dying, but the ideation is never far away.

It sounds as if you don't have much ideation but maybe you don't value your life or that you feel you shouldn't be here, alive. If that is the case talk those thoughts through with your Pdoc/ T, I think they will give you the chance to explain how grave you feel it is.

[twizzlerheaded]

Maybe I should wait to say something to my T. I just got a kitten, great right? Anyway, like most kittens, she bites and scratches in good fun, but my arms and hands have scratches all over them. I DEFINITELY don't want my doc to get the wrong idea lol. "It was the kitten I swear!" haha

[TheOriginalMe]

Ha that happened to me once, I had a puppy, sharp teeth, lots of scratchy marks on my hands. I spent an hour trying to explain that it was puppy, I ended up being sent for a tetanus jab, I don't think they believed me.

[TexasMedicine]

Yes, I feel there is a difference between wanting to just expire and being in a suicidal state. Personally, I think if I have to be alive, then harming myself and making my life even less pleasant and more damaged is pointless.