[waterknob1234]

We are celebrating the passing of an old year and the start of a new year. I am a little blah, humbug on this. I always enjoy Christmas but I don't enjoy New Year's as much. I celebrate it like everybody else but I can't get excited about it. 2014 was not a good year for me and I hope 2015 will be better. But I know I have to take steps to improve my life. I am afraid. I am afraid of the unknown. I am somewhat afraid of leaving the hell I work in to jump into what could be a worse situation.

I was very happy over Christmas. I had time off work, I was able to spend time with my children. Now my son has gone back to school 5 hours away. After New Year's we take down the Christmas tree and it's back to reality.

Depression is still there somewhat but it has eased up a little. What bugs me is I still have nightmares. I don't know if that has to do with a little underlying depression or if it is a side effect of my medication.(Wellbutrin and amitriptyline) Usually my nightmares are about messing up something at work.

For all the anxiety I get about work, usually things go okay lately. I can just never keep up with the clerical tasks. For whoever reads this, thanks for listening to me vent.

[sideblinded]

Hi waterknob1234

I wish you and yours a very Happy New Year.

I always have trouble wishing this as I know so many people who are struggling with health and emotional problems. I hate saying the word happy when I know they are in the depths of depression so I change it up a little bit. Sorry about your depression, nightmares and anxiety. I have a lot of depression and anxiety as well.

Thanks for being so supportive here.

[TheOriginalMe]

I hope that 2015 will be a different and better year than 2014 and that you find peace and contentment. The fireworks have just upset my dog, so I'll have to go and see her. I was hoping for an early night.

[waterknob1234]

Why does New Years make me so sad? I even started out the New Year good because right at midnight my favorite college football team won the orange bowl. Then some people were shooting off cool fireworks behind my house and they were beautiful. Still there is a little part of me that is just sad. Holiday season came and went so fast. I think I am just going to have to think of great things to do as a distraction.

[annoyedgrunt84]

I'm not a big New Years Eve person either I don't even watch the ball drop on TV many years. I do hope you can find some peace in 2015 though.

[Fuzzybear]

[Lizi18]

Originally Posted by waterknob1234

We are celebrating the passing of an old year and the start of a new year. I am a little blah, humbug on this. I always enjoy Christmas but I don't enjoy New Year's as much. I celebrate it like everybody else but I can't get excited about it. 2014 was not a good year for me and I hope 2015 will be better. But I know I have to take steps to improve my life. I am afraid. I am afraid of the unknown. I am somewhat afraid of leaving the hell I work in to jump into what could be a worse situation.

I was very happy over Christmas. I had time off work, I was able to spend time with my children. Now my son has gone back to school 5 hours away. After New Year's we take down the Christmas tree and it's back to reality.

Depression is still there somewhat but it has eased up a little. What bugs me is I still have nightmares. I don't know if that has to do with a little underlying depression or if it is a side effect of my medication.(Wellbutrin and amitriptyline) Usually my nightmares are about messing up something at work.

For all the anxiety I get about work, usually things go okay lately. I can just never keep up with the clerical tasks. For whoever reads this, thanks for listening to me vent.

Hello,

I really do understand your feelings. The period after Christmas is fairly anti-climatic especially when the family all gets together and things seem very different and almost perfect for a while just for them to return back to normal. I think just suddenly loosing most the "holiday joy" from being around family and the overall spirit of Christmas is intensifying your anxiety about work. All I can really say is fear and worry are very normal emotions and to an extent they show we care, letting it get to you too much can ruin things though. Although I don't know you I'm sure you're competent at your job and will handle yourself well. People make mistakes, and If you make a few along the way you only learn from it later on. I wish you a very successful New Year in your job and personal life.

Best of luck

[SeekerOfLife]

Hi Waterknob. Maybe new years is tough because we feel like it is a time to go forward, and we feel like we just cannot. I want some changes in my life too. But I have a lot of fatigue along with the depression. So even getting out of the muck is super hard. I need to start working on finding a new job. I just do not know if I can add one more thing to my to do list. So I can really relate to what you are going through.

[tallulahxoxo]

I miss Christmas hahah. But I'm just gonna count down the days until it's here again.. Like a who in whoville. (:

[waterknob1234]

Feeling a little down and depressed today for no particular reason. I did enjoy serving at church though. I think I am dreading the fact that on my job for the coming year I am going to be asked to do more stuff with less help and resources.

[Clara22]

Originally Posted by waterknob1234

Feeling a little down and depressed today for no particular reason. I did enjoy serving at church though. I think I am dreading the fact that on my job for the coming year I am going to be asked to do more stuff with less help and resources.

I believe that depression has an inner component but also external components. The world of work is not good. We spend a lot of time in places we are treated as if we were machines

[waterknob1234]

Hi Clara. I like your little slogan: Every accomplishment starts with the decision to try. I think that is what I need to do. Make some decisions to change a few things. I want to try and fight this depression. I know medicine alone won't do it. I cannot afford therapy so I will have to do it on my own. You are right in that at work we are treated as if we were machines.