[Bishtaw]

Hello all I think this is the 3rd time posting a sob story spread months apart. Recently I've gone to the doctor and they gave a generic lexapro (right spelling maybe?) And I finally asked my parents for a therapist gave a vague anxiety/stress reason because of college. Though going through both for about a month has seemingly wrecked me I have no motivation to do anything because I'm broken and I'm not worth the work to be fixed. A small part of me felt like throwing in the towel and calling it quits which for some reason didn't really freak me out. I guess I just don't know what to do anymore. I've got lofty life goals that are impossible to accomplish (doctor) and I'm generally sick of everything. I've even started giving up on food since I don't feel it's worth the effort to eat and have resumed SI today after a week or so of being clean. So I guess I don't even have a clue why I'm even posting kinda just felt like its something to vent at. Also I'm certain there are plenty of grammar errors since I'm on my phone, didn't feel like getting up to type.

[Rohag]

Unfortunately, both depression and the meds to fight depression can drain a person of motivation, energy and focus. Please inform your prescribing doctor how you feel being on the meds. Does your college/university offer counseling services? The college may be able to offer special consideration to those with diagnosed depression.

[Bishtaw]

Thankfully I'm going back to the doctor this Friday, unfortunately the community college I'm at doesn't offer much in counselling.Though I feel like I've got nothing to really live for and my current T is only talking about mindfulness which makes everything too difficult to deal with right now and he doesn't know about my SI or darker thoughts as I'm too afraid that a psych ward would take me. Guess I'm too dumb to take help when I could get it anyways so maybe it wouldn't even matter what I said.

[vital]

Originally Posted by Bishtaw

Thankfully I'm going back to the doctor this Friday, unfortunately the community college I'm at doesn't offer much in counselling.Though I feel like I've got nothing to really live for and my current T is only talking about mindfulness which makes everything too difficult to deal with right now and he doesn't know about my SI or darker thoughts as I'm too afraid that a psych ward would take me. Guess I'm too dumb to take help when I could get it anyways so maybe it wouldn't even matter what I said.

Hi Bishtaw,

Mindfulness can be very powerful if you can give it a chance. If you look in the depression success stories section, some people have resolved their entire depression just with meditation.

- vital