Why can't i be happy ?

I've been fighting depression for about 2 years now. I've had my ups and downs. But as of late i've been really down. And i'm graduating high school and our schools prom is this thursday. I mean i should be excited right . I've hated high school all four years and now its finally over and the most i can do is shrug my shoulder. I want to be happy, i want to be excited about prom, i wanna go and enjoy myself with my friends. I don't want to feel numb. But thats i feel. Just numb.
Everyone always says oh don't worry it will get better. But i'm just so sick. Sometimes i wish i could just get in my car and drive away. I've been thinking about that a lot lately. The rational part of my brain knows better though. Yet i'm yearning to go home to arkansas. To be in my mountains again. To fdrive back home and to never look back. I keep telling myself its only 4 more years you just have four more years of college left to go then you can leave. But its not passing fast enough. I can't be excited about graduating when i'll i can do is be home sick.

I feel for you sammi, hope you manage to enjoy prom.

Maybe you can make it to arkansas over summer for a visit or something, or look at colleges there? (I know nothing about American geography, sorry, I'm from the South Pacific).

Anyway hope you feel better, though I know it's a cliche. And don't forget, even non-depressed people get the blues sometimes. Hope you get over yours.

Taking a break from school can do you a lot of good. I am getting more and more young men returning from the Iraq war. I also get men and women returning to school after time in the work force. They appreciate education so much more.

If you are burned out on school, don't do it, or take a reduced schedule at a low-cost state school or community college and figure out what you want to do.

College has been oversold in our society. There are people with law degrees barefuly scraping by as public defenders; teachers can barely support their families; and MBAs also have been over-produced and also face a crowded market. Plumbers and electricians, on the other hand, learn a skilled trade and can make excellent money.

Ask yourself why you want to go to school -- is there something you want to learn or a goal you want to achieve that requies college? Or are you going to please other people?

You will find your way.

I saw a lot of myself in your post. I too feel like I want to drive away and never come back. Mostly I just want to drive until I no longer feel anything. I feel like I'm a burden. I'm also not looking forward to college. I just can't find anything I'm interested in doing, but I think theres a lot of people who feel that way.
I also get the feeling when I'm numb. I convince myself I just don't care because its easier, but I know that I do. I do care, I want to get better, and I want to have hope for my future. Sometimes it just seems that I just can't though. So I'll think if I tell myself enough times that I don't care, maybe I won't.
I don't know if any of that is how you feel but I just wanted to let you know you're not alone.